All i Have To Say

2008-07-13T02:15:00.000-07:00

I found an article of the TJ VS IJ match thanks to Ayuni's link on the IJ Floorball blog! HAHAHA.

Unfortunately, some of the remarks were:

"Frankly, it was seen to be a rather violent match as there were petite bodies sardined by the girls themselves."

"The match was more or less a repetition of players dashing from one end of the court to another.There were several close shaves, but the game seemed rather draggy."

I saw a pic of me, and frankly, it was unflattering, but for memories' sake. I shall put it on.

I love my Floorball squad. Good game, girls!

Credits to http://redsports.sg/2008/07/12/ijc-tjc-floorball/

Youre So cold, put your hands in Mine

2008-07-13T01:29:00.000-07:00

Listenin to: Walk on Water or Drown by Mayday Parade

I dont quite like this band. There is nothing really spectacular. Hmmm.. they are oh-kayy. They sound like bands i listen to back in Secondary school. Angry, unsatisfied, those kind of emotions. But i dont feel that way anymore. so i dont feel for the song anymore. however, i can relate to love songs tho im not in love. That such a universal feeling, dont you think?

But i like their song Jersey. My weekends are kinda wasted again. Ive loads to do, and yet, ive not gotten down to doing it. ITS A DRAGGGG< I TELL YOU. I need someone to give me a tight slap so that i will wake up and start studying! But i think im consulting Mr Chow tmr and studying with Lydia Mak so, maybe thats a start? HAH! Pray hard for me man!

Singfest lineup killing me! URGH.

Other news, ive been eatin like madd. Putting on 1.2kg hasnt dettered me it seems. *snorts* I hope i dont sound bimbo, cos im NOT. Anyway, ate prata and nuggets(??) for breakfast, and ate a great family sunday lunch - as usual and ate like 7+ Want Want milk sweets. OMGOSSHH. No training spells trouble for my slowing metabolism rate!

I was walking to religious clas when i saw this kid playing floorball under the blocks. I went "He's so lucky, and he probably doesnt even know it. He gets to play Floorball and is probably in a club, while i have to study for Alevels. WTHH"

I miss floorball. Yesterday, since i wasnt studying *ehem*, i watched teevee and realsied they was absolutely NOTHING on teevee please. I was getting tired of switching through the channels and finally gave in to watchin the mteevee show Fraternity Life 2. URGHHH. I hate Frat boys and sorority sisters, they dont have these in singapore do they? They are mean people i tell you. anyway, while i was thinking like why wasnt there any good shows, that was when i remembered. I was ~~always~~ well, most of the time, stuck at valhall, staurday evening. so no good shows didnt quite bother me then. and even if i was at hom, i had Prelim 1 to stidy for, jsut like how im suppose to have Prelim 2 study for now. *hits forehand*

I have to get going, GP essay is calling me and GP detailed outline is getting impatient. LOL. Cheers!

Hurrah for a new beginning. Life without Floorball.

Cause Jersey just got colder and
I'll have you know i'm scared to death
That everything that you had said to me was just
A lie until you left
Now i'm hoping just a little bit stronger
Hold me up just a little bit longer
I'll be fine, i swear
I'm just gone beyond repair

ALL THE WAY.

2008-07-10T03:34:00.000-07:00

I think there are a lot of things IJ Girl Floorball Team can be proud of for the year 08. And perhaps, this will be the jumping board for the Team of 09.

I can hardly believe im playing my last match tmr. Im just gonna miss Floorball so much! But it has been a a rolling good time, and as much as it could have been the cause for the lengthy U's i'll be getting for Prelims, i dont regret, cos i did my best juggling the two.

*
*
*

that was yest entry that i didnt manage to post. I shall continue today.

It is the end of A divisions. It came a little too soon. And i miss the squad already. If i could say something to my J1s now, i think it would be to take the time to get to know your squad now. Cos, after all the trainings and the sweat and the games, they are definitely gonna be more than just your friends - your good friends. They are ones who thoroughly understand how it feels to go to training dreading it but coming out and feeling on top of the world cos you just kicked butt together and the spirit to fght is so strong. They are the ones who understand how it feels to lose. They know your pain. They know exactly how you feel. They are the ones whose shoulder you'll depend on after the game. They are your teammates. Ad they'll always be there for you. So, my advice, Get to know them. Cos one day, it will all end. You'll step down and you'll wish you could do it all over again, exactly the same way.

We finally beat a team. 4-0 against TJ. coach was a little disappointed i think. Cos he expected like a thrashing cos he said that we were the better team, but we were still weak mentally so we still were weak int hat aspect. But nevertheless, he said we fought hard, and i think he was pleased with our attitude.

I passed out my gift to the squad, Fredo chocs and this card that was suppose to be a floorball that was orange due to our jersey colour but i think nobody quite got it. Lela thought they were oranges -.- Im that bad in Art people. Oh the horror. We watched the VJ VS NJ match and lemme tell you. It was great fun. NJ is a team of spirited individuals man. SERIOUSLY. two goals down in the first period, and at the end of 2nd period, if im not mistaken, 2 goals UP. Respect. And they truly did play out VJ. Of course i can understand VJ's pain but they were tired and really not playing their best. they totally let NJ control the game. So, it seems VJ wont be going to semis as everyone predicted after all. It will be Meridien, Raffles, Yishun and National. Well, may the best team win. Hopefully, IJ will there next year.

Im not gonna dwell on what ifs, cos im not gonna wake up and it will be the morning of RJ match. NO. It wont. It will be a saturday, and i ahve to get on with my dull studying lifestyle. Also, i have to face the music and tell my dad my results soon. Oh dear. I feel the dread of school coming around already.

~~Squad~~ Team meal was fab. I ate with Ci'en, Siti, Lela, Starsky, Aza and Atassha. Im so gonna miss these people! We talked and laughed at Aza until our tummies hurt. It was so nice. We came like 3++? And left at 5+. not bad. We keot bullying Aza. HAHAHAH. "Is this your sole? *shaking a serviette*" HAHAHAH. We talked about boyfriends, jokes and the games. The boys are having training 7-9 today. I want them to go to semis, tho i dont too cos i want the girls to go to semis. Looks like there is no playing at Tampines as ive dreamed about. I wished i'd realise the want earlier. But, nvm, 09 squad will do better. And me and Siti and the other seniors will be down supporting the girls next year, InsyaAllah. =D

But i know, i am glad the Adivs are over. Cos i think im starting to feel the physical drain of trainings. Altho im not in the first two line, i go thorugh the same amount of training and i think its taking a toll on my body. Ive been dozing off during lectures and tutorials and that is not good for my studies. Got to get down to getting it right. More essays, more planning. No more time wasting. I hope all the Floorballers will study hard too. We'll do better for Prelim 2 girls! coach is right, what we experience on court is unique, only athletes know the feeling. And i think beiong on court is the same with being the driver of your life. Theres one shot, make it happen. Theres one major paper, get the grades, make it happen. You always have to have the hunger to win, or else, you wont win. I believe coach is exemplary. I hope he sticks around.

Im so thankful for the squad and all the experience that came with ebing part of the 08 squad. Im gonna hunt Aza for Pictures now. HAHAHA. =P

Take care people. I cant believe i wont be talking about training anymore. Did i mention? I put on 1.2 kg. burn,burn,burn them fats!

i cant stop how i feel

2008-07-07T07:05:00.000-07:00

oh whats new? Ive found a new metro station to fall in love with. I think im crazy but i cant help myself, theres just something about this band that makes me go bonkers. They make me feel like its okay to hate a relationship, to jump about when youre happy, and even strength to get about your day when all you want is to freaking sleep in. Get it?

Today's training was one of the most fulfilling and most tiring. Coach truly pushed us, and as much practice that we had for that 3 hours, we aso had breaks cos we trainined with our lines. I was soaked by the end of training. And we got Coach a jersey too! =D With his name, Jamie, printed.

"I'll wear this on Friday", he said.

He cant make it for Weds unfortunately, but somehow, God is kinda telling me that we'll be okay. And Coach too. He was jsut advisingthat we dont let the stress get to us.

AND NO MJ TALK WEDNESDAY MORNING.

Im in line 3. Normally i'd be upset, but right now, im not. I dunno, i love the squad, but i dont think there is a place for someone like me on the first 2 lines, you know. Im so klutzy and not really great on the ball. So i think Jolene and Atassha will do a better job tho im not saying that im not gonna do my best. I WILL. But perhaps, i jsut need less pressure on my shoulders, no matter how much i miss playing with Fathin and Lela. I think i'll leave the first two lines to kick ass.

my free hit practices were really bad! HAHAHA! but amusing. I enjoy playing with Sherry. I feel so J1-ishh cos it seems like im learning jsut like Sherry is. But hey, its still an opportunity.

Love is real (love is real)
But thats not what i feel.

You get close
I keep a distance
I never thought
i would miss this
I think somethings going wrong
You can feel it in this song.

good riddance

2008-07-06T20:28:00.000-07:00

I just have to blog.

I feel so damn frustrated. Im in one of those dont-make-a-peep-or-i'll-scream-at-you kind of moods. Ive been screaming at my sis and honestly i hate it when i make her cry but i truly truly cant stand when people make a mess of my room and when all i want is to shut the oor, see everything is where it is and jsut listen to music. the whole house was so noisy with screaming and bickering from m siblings, watching TRL jsut made me more impatient. Reading a book was not as fun cos there were my siblings invading my privacy.

I JUST NEED PEACE SO BAD RIGHT NOW, but nooooooo... you had to leave my room in a mess and make me shout at the top of my lungs from the secong floor.

GOD. Whats happening? I jsut want to get out of here and head to training. Empty stomach or not.

WTF cares? I dont. I dont give a hoot.

Well today is a gift and it makes it a present

2008-07-05T06:18:00.000-07:00

Training was bittersweet. Im glad i came. We did some drills before Aza gave a pep talk.

Aza: Who's still sore about yesterday game?
I raised my hand
Me: Oh wait. Did you mean sore feelings or sore body?
*Team laughs*
That wasnt a dumb question right? HAHA. At least it made the team last and ended (at least to an extent) the tension that existed on court.

The conversation continued and i said some ~~dumb~~ funny stuff again. I dunno. I think we should have more jokes to share around court you know. Not just talk about training itself.

But training was bittersweet and im glad i came. And i think i make a pretty good defender! HAH! Much improved from my first 2 friendly when i was given the position as a defender. Anyhows, Lela could not make it cos she fell ill with a fever. Poor girl, me and siti had made her walk from RP to CWP and with the emotion from R-jay match, i bet it just accumulated to ehr fever. Get better soon! AND COME FOR MONDAY's TRAINING, LELA!!! I missed having you around, and we hada different company for late lunch. Ayuni, myself, Farhanah, Fathin and widayu. I perspired a lot, and am so proud of myself.

I think its a blessing in disguise when coach couldnt make it today. Its like, i think we needed to be together as a team and deal properly with our emotions for this training without coach being too hard on us. Do you know what i mean? I think we kinda let loose a little and could breathe easier as training went on. It was also an opportnunity to get better without coach breathing down our necks, or my neck in particular.

I dont know why im not performing the way i was in TJ, NJ (2nd match) and even RJ. although the RJ match was when i realised i was doing a lot of backhand, which were according to coach, really bad and a waste. I think Prelims kinda interrupted our momentum. HURRRRHHHH. I need to get back to match fitness or else, next week will be pronounce the last couple of matches i'll play in my life which will suck so bad. *touch wood*

There was this fiasco with the MJ goalie at IJ tagboard. I found it amusing, not because of the whole accusation thing, i mean, that was bad(!) but, i found it amusing that the goalie would be there. I shall leave it at that. I mean whats mroe to say right?

Ive not been studying and Babe has. I dont knwo why im treating this like a break when its NOT. I shall get back to studying tmr. Today, perhaps i'll do my lit homework. SIGH, school begins. and more results to come. Oh did i mention, 31.5 overall for math.

I want to put up our jerseys, but my phone is giving me problems and the pics are in there. URGH. The cable or the connection but be weak. Oh well, maybe a group pic!

Gotta get down to Lit. Enough slacking. Im feeling better now.

As my dad says, it aint over till the fat lady sings. Or in Coach's/Aza's words: The game is not over till the whistle is blown.

My stressed up head couldnt even get that yesterday.

Yesterday is a mystery
Tomorrow is a mystery
Well today is a gift
and it makes it a present

Mr White/A cursive Memory

somehow, my feelings changed

2008-07-04T18:53:00.000-07:00

im afraid to go for training. i dont know why. I just am.

Im starting to feel very confused.

I felt slightly better after seeing Aza's and Ayuni's tag. Ive such great teammates. I need to do something about my attitude towards games.

I think Fathin's right. I play better when im not so stressed up. I need to unwind my mindset. And remember Lydia's advice. Thank you for everyone who sms-ed me to show concern about the match. I love you guys so much, i feel like only you know how it feels. I didnt even tell my parents about the match. I think its easier skipping the adult advice, when it comes to sports.

This is quite frustrating.

thanks, girls.

but you never ever let me in`

2008-07-04T02:27:00.001-07:00

I only have myself to blame for playing with my head and not my heart.
And my head didnt help much cos it was all stressed up and placing importance on winning instead of keeping cool and doing my best for the team.

You want to know how much 10 mins is worth, ask me. Its worth more 5 balls. Cos if we made full use of it, we would have won.

7-2.
We've only ourselves to blame.

Losing is agonising.
We've only ourselves to blame.
We went in with a negative attitude, and so we received a negative result.
We should have more ocnfidence in ourselves.

Would coach coming earlier make a difference? Perhaps.
But we'll never know the answer to that will we?
So, the fact is,

WE'VE ONLY GOT OURSELVES TO BLAME.

You're my E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G/ Everywhere, everytime, everything

2008-07-03T06:28:00.000-07:00

Im getting jumpy. Eggcited. Cos im listening to A cursive memory and their song makes me smile. Imagine someone singing it to you. HAHAHA. You are my e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g, everywhere, everytime, everything.

Love is so amazing. Cant wait for it to blow my mind.

Today, Economics was an interesting lesson. You realise, teachers arent perfect. They've life too. They have responsibilities too. Not just to you, to their family. after all, they are a daughter, a son, a mother, a grandchild too? Two seniors dropped by to give motivational talks. My floorball senior, Nadiah, got 3As and 2Bs. She is like the prime example of how everything is possible if you put your mind to it. her tips: 1) Plan 2) Organise 3) Learn from your mistake 4) FORCUS AND PERSEVERE. She the kind to advice that you shouldnt hang around gossip and bad blood, just play nice, and you'll do fine. And really, all we want to be is fine right?

Words of wisdom. Prelim 1 is over, but not A-levels. Theres still time to step up my game and strategy. this implies to everyone too. Study hard ya'll!

R-jay match tmr. Coach said Raff-les. HAHA, i hope we can proudly say we did our best tmr. no mental block and all that crap. Plus, its at RP. Some ringers are sure to be there. NO PRESSURE, people!

Cheers. Gonna sleep at 10 but first for some music.

Welocome to my dreamiest nightmare
When youre so close but you never get there.
Theres still some things you need to say to me.

But I didn't want the train to come

2008-07-02T07:54:00.000-07:00

cheers people!

Im online. SURPRISE SURPRISE. All thanks to Prelim 1 being over, and now, ive got my eyes set on Prelim 2 afetr the Sept hols. I finally contacted Jessica, and i can honestly say that i'll miss having her around and with me on the table though we spent little time tgt as classmates. Nevertheless, shes one of the most honest and sweet person i know.

Oh! Gravity. Why cant we seem to keep it together?

Sounds familiar, safa? Soundtrack to Life of ryan. Cant wait for the new season, i hope theres more of shane sheckler. and the Hills! =D

You know what, i feel guilty. I feel like i didnt prepare myself well for Prelim 1 and so im going to get lousy results. and im going to disappoint and be looked upon helplessly.

URGH. What did i gte myself into? I keep telling myself Prelim 2 will be better, but how do you jump grades? sometimes, you cant help but question yourself.

Oh bummer, shut up syuhrah.

Training was so frustrating. I think im so a Substitute come friday. totally horrendous on the ball. Keep the ball too long. Positioning was so off. Free hit needs time to perfect. Get ready for this. coach is not going to be at our match, perhaps only Weds. Im so HORRIFIED. I felt like crying. Seniors will be helping us out. I really am filled with doubts now. *tries to brush them away and FAILS miserably* Help? I just want to get to semis.

Im off. Im starting to sound like a brat and im NOT a brat! I need metro station i think. Oh, my new jersey is gorg. Or so i think. Well, at least i have torres on my back - figuratively, people.

~~Cheers!~~
SCRATCH THAT. im not unhappy, im just, a little too restless, a little to impatient.

If you let go, i'll let go tonight.

2008-06-30T03:42:00.000-07:00

You want my mixtape to survive this horrendous period?

Control - Metro Station
Now that we're done - Metro Station
Making the band 4 - I want you exclusive (this will be tough to get)
Warwick avenue (Safa's tip) - Duffy
Oh! Gravity - Switchfoot
That's not my name - The Ting Tings
All we are - One Republic

I was just saying during our freedom (in advance) lunch with the girls, namely, Siew En, Melissa Maniam, Safarina, Nicole Tan and Myself, that i wasnt looking forward to the MTV Asia awards, but i just found something to be eggggcited about regarding the show! Jared Leto (Mr 30 secs to Mars) is hosting! A breath of fresh air i must say! But the nomination list is still disappointing. Where's Taufik Batisah? Im no big fan but credits due where credits are due, people!

Other news, Singfest's line-up is uberrrrr impressive. Im dying at the thought i cant go. There's Simple Plan, Jamie Scott and the Town, Alicia Keys, FOB oh my! I hope metro stations not coming. OR ELSEEEE.... self-explanatory isnt it?

Met Raji in the GO today. Talked about A-divs. I really hope IJ GIRLS/BOYS get to go to semis. AT LEAST. Then we can have a bus of INNOVIANS down! =D That'll be my secret wish though, now its not so secret but who reads this thing anyway? Trainings back on Wednesday.

I was trying to put econs paper out of my mind but since i have the luxury of time (ERR.. not exactly), I shall make it a quikie. It was OH-KAYYY. =S

Also, it my mum's birthday! the big 41! HAPPY BIRTHDAY. My bro and I got her this mango set with lotion and shower gel and perfume called delirium. SE-XAYYYY. HAHA. It has a really nice smell and i must say, the packaging just helped me make up my mind almost instantly. You guessed it! PINKKKKKK. thanks Safa and the girls for tagging along! Oh, love.

I found this qoute. I found it AMUSING. TREMENDOUSLY.
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his. ~Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895

Besides that Spain won. Lemme post some pics, Lets go yahoo-ing shall we? I cant even find a single vid. Maybe its too soon? SIGH. Anyhow, all you need to know, liverpool's rookie and my favourite (and loveeee) Fernando Torres scored the one and only goal of the match. Quality player, always. okay, got it. =)

I saw a clip with the Euro song Can you hear me by Enrique Iglesias. I think i could add that to my mixtape too. Kinda fits the majestic event after all. Congratulations Xavi for being player of Euro 2008. And SPAIN, after 44 year, youve broken the duck! And you did it without me watching the game! AWESOME! Still, i wont miss a match come World cup at South Africa, promise. LOL. I just wish i could spend more time watching the Euro games. =(

hanna, till forever friends.
Sincerely yours, never again.

<3 Theres jsut something about that trace cyrus that makes you go hmmmm~

She dying on the dance floor

2008-06-27T03:00:00.000-07:00

Its been so loooonnngg since i last blogged.

Prelims have been a wreck. I dunno what to make of it? I dont think there is even one paper that i can get a D. I jsut feel so bummed out that i didnt comeplete my essays fro history, econs case study 2 was tough, math was URGHHHH and that paper 2 was double URGHHHH and lit has its fiar share of doubts.

Other than that metro station has been a great comfort. Sometimes i feel sad when i listen to them and other times, i feel delighted. Ive still not found song of the year for me. HAHAH. I was thinking about Apologise from One Republic cos thats the song my beloved brother dances too and he looks so cute and i enjoy listening to the strings in that song too. But im thinking of giving it to Metro station for their song shake it. Oh whats the rush, its just closing into july! *whispers: A-levels! rolls eyes* Check out this song by metro station. I think its lyrics really made me think.

After the fall
We skipped class and I
I guess our heads needed a break
But our bodies stayed busy
I know that you still miss me

I give and you take it
Two summers spent wasted
Should we give up or save it
Will this make sense at all
After the fall
After the fall
We faded, I'm freezin
After the fall
We had it all
Now I'm barely breathin

Did you have to turn your back
When forever didn't last
Two years and six months
Have you even looked back once
Your body felt like summer
But we spent the fall apart
And we'd know by December
If the cold could remember

I give and you take it
Two summers spent wasted
Should we give up or save it
Will this make sense at all
After the fall
After the fall
We faded, I'm freezin
After the fall
We had it all
Now I'm barely breathin

I miss you
Is it still okay to say it
I miss you
I know that it's too late but
We'll all stay in to hide the seasons
Feel the same for different reasons
We lost the road but I prefer it
We're used to bein so discouraged

I give and you take it
Two summers spent wasted
Should we give up or save it
Will this make sense at all
After the fall
After the fall
We faded, I'm freezin
After the fall
We had it all
Now I'm barely breathin

I miss floorball. I cant wait for training to start. And A-divs to drain this awfully tired mind of mine. =(

And TGIF.

Metro Station Makes Me Go ` i'll be OKAY.

2008-06-24T02:05:00.000-07:00

I cant get over this song.

its you and me, moving at the speed of light towards eternity

2008-06-18T22:09:00.000-07:00

I swear im going to do my ~~bloody~~ econs essay after this. OKAYYYY, perhaps after lunch? Im so damn screwed. I was suppose to have consultation today with Ms wang on Q2 and Q5 of Macro tut, but bloody hell, i fogot and only remembered at 11.50+ while Amy macdonald's song was about to play on mteevee. I immediately jumped on the my computer and started looking for my incomeplete essay. And i decided to strat the whole essay again cos i tot the prev essay's intro was bs.

Sorry for my language, im jsut getting really anxious.

Floorball sint going too well for me too. I got into fourth line. Thats the last line. EURGHHHH. What the hell is wrong with me? Everybody i just fighting to get into the squad and i feel like im oing my ebst too, turning up for training and try to get that backhand right but im still not breaking into 2nd line. SO FRUSTRATED. I feel like im even at threat of not making it into the team final list. Coach is stressing me out real bad, and he doesnt even know it.

Other than that, ive been spending time with my fam and i love it. They are the best when it comes to taking of my mind of FB and studies. Tho' my dad keeps asking.

Prom venue and price changed. swisshotel? YUP. Cant wait for the end of the year somehow.

For ome reaosn i cant wait for school to strat and prelim 1 to be over. Cos ir ight now? i jsut wasnt to prepare for prelim 2 as dumb as that sounds.

Im jetting. Oprah's on. AND YESSSSSS, i'll do my ~~bloody~~ essay.

Feels like were on another level (ohh ahh)
Feels like our loves intertwine
We can be two rebels
Breakin the rules
Me and you
You and I
All you gotta do is watch me
Look what I can do with my feet, baby
Feel the beat inside

Chris Brown Forever

So bring on the Rain, and bring on the THUNDER.

2008-06-13T18:31:00.000-07:00

dont listening to old songs just make you sentimental. I was in the mood to study yesterday, after returning home and watching hOURSSSS of teevee *smiley face* and studied till one. Did hist on Chine economic development. Im starting to likee this theme.

anyhow, i was jsut studying while plugged into my bro's music file since i used his phone (god knows where my MP3 is) and i found he has a few old rock songs, and i just stopped mapping the mind map for a few minutes to browse thorugh all his songs. And i felt this rush of the past.

I kept trying to remember how i found the band, why i loved it, and who was it most related to now. And i thought about secondary school. And how i wished i could go back and feel how i felt like before. The feelings seem so foreign. Maybe ive changed, not that emo girl anymore, but still, how can i forget the feeling of loving somebody. suddenly, all the crushes ive had seems to amount to nothing cos i never really loved. Okay, maybe once. Stupid khairul. HAH! im kidding. Sidewalks by Story of the year reminded me of OTH. Last train home reminded me of other opportunities. chris Daughtry Over you reminded of the ass. Now now im listening to Evan's Blue The Promises and the threat.

OH WELL. Ive to live in the present dont I? The past has carved me to be who i am, and im much stronger than the person i was. And im not gonna conform to what everyone else thinks cos i realise, all i need to be, is myself. Even if it means, i can look ~~pretty~~ very insane at times. uhhuh.

Oh BABE. GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT? My mum said she'll sponsor me for an overseas trip afetr the A's! We better study hard and then, we can go tripping tgt! finally, the great escape! =D

Gotta bath for im meeting ayuni and lela at adm 10.30 for mini comp at valhall. Stupid VJ freindly busted one of my "toe". Its still swollen!

To spread love like violence

2008-06-11T03:45:00.000-07:00

I just got a call from atassha about jerseys. =D I hope jerseys will be nice and fit well this year. PLUS, i got #9 which is the jersey number of my favourite soccer player. SAY FERNANDO TORRES. second is Lionel Messi *swoons* and thrid is David Villa. David Villa just scored the first hat-trick of Euro 08! WOOOOOWWW. Pool should buy him! LOL.

If ya'll are wondering why im not blogging much about Euro 08. The answer is simple: 1) Engalnd my favourite team (2nd is SPAIN), is not even in the competition. I refuse to elaborate. 2) Im not in the thick if the action! STUPID Starhub wanna make us pay to watch. WTHHH, of course wont pay larh. Like as if we're watching the whole thing. What if SPAIN doesnt even make it to quater-finals (touchwood)? GEEZ.

Anyway, NJ Friendly today. We lost by a goal. =( They are still slightly better than us altho we have improved. We still have to improve more if we are to get into Semi =) I for one did poorly (yet again!). Kept on using backhand and actually my backhand is getting stronger but its still OFFtarget. Coach said shit when i blew my shot. And he made growling sounds when i totally flop my free hit. SO DUMB CANNNN.

I was transfered to 3rd line in the 2nd period. And rested in the middle of 2nd period. Boohoo. But actually i didnt really mind cos i was playing too awfully and needed time to reflect. But in 3rd period i got sub-ed into 1st line. And played with Ci' En. Which i thorughly enjoyed cos Ci'En is indeed a talented player and the 1st line is WOW, really good communication. I managed to nab a rebound and put it into goal. so that my first goal in 3 matches since TJ.

anyhow, tmr is VJ and its a whole different ball game. I cant wait. I love floorball, but now, ive got to get down to studying. That means, ECONS ESSAYSSSS. LOL.

Save me!

Secret Crowds/ Angels and Airwaves

(If I had my own world)
(I'd build you an empire)

If I had my own world
I'd fill it with wealth and desire
The glorious past to admire
And voices of kids out walking,
Dogs, birds, planes, cleanest cars

If I had my own world
I'd love it for all that's inside it
There'd be no more wars, death or riots
There'd be no more police, packed-parking lots,
Guns, bombs sounding off,

Bridge: x2
If I had my own world
I'd build you an empire
From here to the far lands
To spread love like violence

Chorus:
Let me feel you, carry you higher
Watch your words spread hope like fire
Secret crowds rise up and gather
Hear your voices sing back louder

If I had my own world
I'd show you the life that's inside it
The way that it glows when you find it
The way it survives with its families,
Friends or its enemies

Let's make this a new world
I swear you can go if you want to
I know that you have that within you
Inventing the first clean and usable,
God's greatest miracle
Bridge: x2

Chorus: x4

Well bless your soul/ Youre a lonely soul

2008-06-09T08:35:00.000-07:00

'Cause you wont let go, of anything you hold

Doesnt those lyrics jsut grab at you? Its taken from the new single by One Republic called Say (All I Need).

Im not gonna be here for long. I jsut wanted to blog. It seems this is all ive got to turn to for an escape from the work load, and to remain in denial somehow that im gonna be fine. That Prelim 1 is in 2 weeks, but i still have time.

And somehow, this one republic song says it all. About how your heart seems gone. Your passion for life perhaps? Im just stuck at this routine. Im not bitter about it but, theres got to be mroe to all this studying.

I cant wait for Friendlies to just wear down this feelings and keep me focused again.

"Say all I need, is the air I breathe, and a place, to rest my head
Say all I need, is the air I breathe, and a place, to rest my head"

Cheers people.

If you believe me, i'll tell you everything

2008-06-07T17:41:00.000-07:00

THIS IS SO NOT FAIR!!! It seems like ive been online for only 15 minutes but already im left with 15 minutes to blog?!?!?! That measn ive been here 45 minutes?? THATS JUST NOT FAIR! HOW CAN I BLOG EVERYTHING THATS BEEN HAPPENING FOR THE PAST WEEK IN 15 MINUTES?!?!?! hurrrrrr`

Ive been listening to old songs from old bands albums this lovely sunday morning. Saosin; Penelope, Something Corporate; I want to save you, The Rocket summer; What you hate, you make, Silverstein; My Heroine. I miss the times i could jsut chill out here, put my thoughts tgt and write really long entries for god-knows-who whilst listening to really great songs from really great bands.

So much has happenend and week 2 of the Holidays are over, my love. 2 more weeks till the much dread Prelim 1. I refuse to comment! =X

Anyhow, while everybody has been busy getting boyfriends, and watching movies, and oogling at Prince Caspian (I DONT think he is that GORG!), ive been going for Floorball camp, RJ Friendly, Studying (as much as i can, or so i think!), doing community work and resting this tired body of mine. =D

My week has been jam-packked with acticities, and i LOVE it.

You alr know about TJ Friendly, then it was FB camp on Friday. 9am at Grandstand with the girls and set off to Dance floor that will be our sleeping area that ngiht before jetting to Valhall for RJ Friendly.

Im so proud of IJ girls. We truly stand a chance in A-divs. Erase all doubts, and train hard. We can make it through. At the end of the 2 periods, the score was 4-4. NOT BAD AT ALL. And after substituting the 2 strongest line, the final score at the end of 3rd period 8-5. YEAHHHHHH. We lost, but it was so awesome, seeing even the 3rd and 4th line working damn hard. And i can truly walk out of the floor damn proud of IJ Girls. We worked hard for it and we totally can be satisfied. Next frindly, NJ and VJ on the same day. I really dont know if that a good idea but it doesnt seem too bad, does it?? HAHAHA.

Headed back to school for luch that ayuni's parents prepared. thank you for the food and i hope youre parents will be okay yeah. The girls definitely appreciated it, so no worries. =) We jsut gulped down our food in a matter of minutes larh since we were so hungry. It was 3++ larh, late lunch what did you expect?!

After that had screening of our matches. HAHA. That was a funny experience and yet, it was insightful. We were all jsut lying down and watching the clip. SO FUNNN. Siti and I were laughing tgt like man. HAHA.

then we had training. Well, our camp jsut revolved around training, 2.8k runnin at 6 in the morning and bonding. It was jsut great fun. I love my FB mates, and you know the icing on this (banana chocolate) cake? I made the cut for IJ 16 people team 08! Im so blessed to be part of an amazing team and to experience this with all of the girls. I want to say thank you specifically to Ayuni and Lela for being such a great teammates who never fail to encourage me to be a better payer, advice and still make time to be such great freinds that never fail to stand by my side! To siti, for all the laughs and for understanding how i feel about FB and studdying, cant wait to be in mini comp with YOU. And Aza and Ci'en for coordinating such a FUNNNNNNN camp and being lovely supportive captains. You truly deserve a pat on the back for being leaders of this team. To the rest of the girls i bonded with, thanks for coming down because turning up is already 80% of wiining the whole battle. Thanks for the love and effort.

We were all too tired for team lunch and ended up just eating the leftover banana choc cake from Joelle's mum. Delicioso! =D Also, yesterday, was going to be the last day in which we were going to see Leonart! YUP, he is going back to Hamburg, GEr and im so sad that i wont be able to see him play for our Boys. =( But, i wish him a safe plane ride home and i hope he will remember us somehow, even if its just through a picture on a cup! =D

I made it in time for family lunch, as usual, mum cooks great and we had steamed fish and prawn and sawi (is that lettuce in english??). And then, i just dozed off! OH MY! till 4. HEHHH. I know larh, i have a lot to catch up with. HAHH. =X But after that, i caught up with some work, did Maclaurin and today, gonna do Integration today.

Did i mention i brought home the Goalie helmet? LOL. Look, what my dad did!

The next floorball player in the family, i predict! HAHAH.

also, this week, we did community work at chen Su Lan Methodist's children home. Here are the pictures!

I miss my girls so much, not to mention the literally far LydMak. LOL. She should be back any day now. =) Cant wait for her call. And wow, 10 days of NO M talk! HAHAH. KIDDING, Lyd!

MOLES UNITE

im running late according to my schedule, i should be doing Lit now, and i haven even bathed! OH GOSHH. See ya! For more pics girls, please IM me and i send via Sharing Folder kay. So much easier.

If you dont dream big

2008-06-04T23:38:00.000-07:00

I have to learn to put the team first and not always my feelings. Im such a booboo sometimes. And i get disappointed easily. I shouldnt put myself down like that. The girls won over TJC yesterday. And yes, im so proud of us. But of course im disappointed with my performance still. Its improving but its still insufficient. I know TJC will train hard now and when it come around to A-divs, they'll be a more prepared team. Anyhow, why wasnt i pleased with my performance? 3 or 4 shots with none going into the goal. HOW SAD. 2 were close but i hit the goalie and was abut to take rebounder when ref blew the whistle. DAMN. And the most horrid part? I was substituted in the third period! I honestly felt like crying. But i didnt want to be sour grapes, after all 22 people turned up for the match so i coach was jsut giving everyone a share. And i deserve it too for not scoring when i could. =(

At least i got into the right positions and helped Farhana score. I badly want to score. RJ match next. Im going to do better. The only way from here is UP. And i mean this for the whole IJ Girls team. We can only improve and get better towards A-divs. SO DONT GIVE UP. Even with a scoreline as bad as 16-0. =X LOL. Dont ask me how that happened. Im shaken up but.... HEY, tmr is a brand new day. Anything can happen, and anything WILL happen.

I need to do 3 chaps of math now. Cos i wasnt doing math for 3 straight day including today. DAMN. Wish me luck! HAHA.

so reach out for something more

Just for tonight; seems like we won this.

2008-06-02T19:19:00.000-07:00

hellohhelloh!

Dont you think friends are just such wonderful ~~beings~~ human beings(GOSH, the works of Mr Chow)?. Dont you think that team spirit is just inspirational? Dont you think the night is the best part of the day?

Yesterday, we had training at Valhall. 4-6pm. And training was so good! Then, i wouldnt have thought that perspiring was good but NOW, its like, the more you do perspire, the better! It was so humid and the fans were like moving so slowly, you could barely feel it! WHAT the heck are fans for then? We hardly play a match cos Aza wanted us to play half-court and strict defending attacking and the J1 since they missed a week of training due to Summer Tests, knew nutss about the words "half-court" and how to defend. so there was a lot of explaining and little play. =( I jsut realised that im really bad with half court goals so i need more practice with that. also, my turning around defenders is pretty bad! =X okay, REALLY bad!

Before training, studies with Ilham at the lib, and Raji came along afters. It was an alright study session because i wasnt talking but i starting losing focus about an hour before i head to meet Ayuni because the place was freezing. So i jsut photocopied notes from Ilham.

Next, met ayuni and Lela for lunch at banquet before heading to Valhall. We were late to the busstop so they left w/o us, an we made our own way there. =D

Coach wasnt there but it was still a pretty tiring training. Did suicide and OMG, i feel on my BUMMM! OUCH! Yeah, we had to jog backwards and somehow, i jsut fell! *whispers: KLUTZ*

Then, after training, bathed and went out to eat with Aza, Ayuni and Lela, at City hall Sakura. =) It was a lovely dinner with all of us, eating and talking and jsut chilling us tgt. Then we took the "bounce-back" train back home. While at the LOOOOONNNNGGGG stop, Lela was taking pictures of us and all. MAYBE, i'll get the pics.

These are pics from Seoul Garden after the Friendly we won! We should take more picstures girls!

i'll just do the quiz next time. =D

So much more to say
So much to be done
Don't you trick me now
We shall overcome
So all that's left is praying

Gavin Rossdale-Love Remains The Same

is there a tumour in your humour?

2008-05-30T06:11:00.000-07:00

time has passed so fast. I honestly dont know whats keeping me alive. Continuously breathing under this heap of expectation, workload and jsut mounting stress. For once, i can say, i am indeed stressed. But i feel calmer. I think its cos i know school is OFFICIALLY over for Term 2 and its back to mugging as starsky says.

I think i really owe it to Floorball for helping to keep my stress level down. I mean, everytime i enter Futsal, i remember Aza's words, that is "When its time for Floorball, concentrate on floorball. And when its time to study, then concentrate on studying." who knew those simple words could mean so much. Everytime i finish training even if i played like crap or well, i just feel so enlightened. So light. It makes me feel good but most importantly, it keeps me focused for at least 2 hours to work on my math! HAHAHA. It just feels really good.

Like today. After training (ive stopped rushing off), i stayed a bit to take a breather in the cold wet evening. Talked to Starsky and Ayuni and Aza. Discussed the mini comp., joked about a bit about god-knows what and then i amde my way to the cantten while they continued to slack there. They joined me at the canteen only after close to one hour later? and they either bathed or well, thats only starsky, played floorball.

OH HAHAH. I was doing transformation and i couldnt do some parts esp with the y square. And they helped me with it! =D I love my floorball team so much. They were all so nice about it even tho i was quite embarassed that i didnt know some stuff. HAHAH. OHOHOH.. okay, not to scare anyone but, oh gosh, the hair at the back of my neck jsut totally stood at its ends but the toilet in the canteen might be haunted man. OH MY. Okay, i know youre now syaing like "URGH. thats dumb" But it might just be true!

Okay, this is wrong to be put on the blog so if you want, you have to ask me. Cos i dont want people getting into trouble for my pure bliss of sabotaging. HAHAH.

Walked back with them and decided to skip dinner with them to go home and take a good shower in the dark (yeah, the light was spoilt). and then went down to have dinner.

I found a pic of my siblings and i back then without Mustaqim. And i was wearing this horrendous chamander (think pokemon) pants that was short for my height, and we all had our own hand-made masks on and we all posed. LMAO. Its so funny. Yet, i could help thinking about all that happened in the old house. All the bad memories and the secrets. And then "would have been's" just popped out. and i didnt want to think of them all. I mean, i was not exactly having the best week, why kill my week that way?

Oh, a funny incident happened during econs lect too. To do with Dominic and Kar Xiu and well, seating. HAHAHA. I was quite embarassed. Hey mel, i didnt jinx anything okay! LOL.

On a side note: this is for babe.

I know youve been making an effort. It hasnt gone unnoticed. your call just slipped my mind, and when i asked in the GO what was it about and you said "nothing" i know it meant "everything". And i couldnt, for some reason, just stop whatever it was i was doing to give you a hug that both of us needed so much. and i felt so guilty. Like why was i not talking to my bestfriend? that movie we never caught, that call we never made. And to think Aza was jsut talking about a movie after a friendly after training. We should catch up, even if it means studying. just knowing youre there right in front of me like youve always been or even tried to be, is so comforting. Im been okay, and i from what i read you seem good too. But well, they always said in PW, blogs are unrealiable sources. So, perhaps, we need more than a blog to keep updated. I love you babe. And i know, these 2 years will only make us stronger. And yes, i think youve become much stronger. And im so proud of you and what we have.

"Though our communication wanes at times of absence, I'm aware of a strength that emanates in the background."
-Claudette Renner

i feel stuck here, against the pavement

2008-05-25T16:31:00.000-07:00

Im listening to Little things by Colbie Caillat. And the first person i thought of was Lydia. I think she'd be able to relate to this song easily. But, im not gonna recommend it to he jsut yet, cos i just she'll squel like 8 octaves, and then... HAHAH. I love you lydia, you know, patience always seems to reap benefits, so maybe it will be in your case. =)

Anyhooo, its the first day of Prelim 1 and of course the second day will be on 24 June but thats not the point. Its General Paper today. YUP, im getting the butterflies. I feel like Mr Chow has draw this circle for me and i feel very restricted. But i realise that it is only in this circle that i am relevant so i HAVE to keep to this circle, no matter how tempted i may be about crossing over.

Do you get the analogy?

Im scared i wont have enough content. Im afraid of making grammatical errors (remember: People are the ONE???). Im afraid every "cool" word i chose to use in this exam will just get flushed away when i enter the classroom. OOOOOOOOOOO~ Im being paranoic. HAHA. Just the way Mr Chow wants us to be. And i really really want to finish up my compre and essay. If i fail to do that, then ive failed my most important goal in this paper. Better to be worried and paranoic then to be relaxed and make mistake because you were not being extrta careful right? =)

Also, i apologise for not updating enough. Im just getting a little bored with typing too much. So perhaps, i'll be doing less and less blogging nowadays. I jsut seem to have to do other things now when im online. For example, reading really good VJC essay and oicking out 3 points. Searching for relevant Econs articles. HAHA. Yeah, im making FULL use of the internet. You should too. Its really beneficial.

On other news, david cook won American Idol season 7.Im relatively(??) happy? I guess, its not the same as Jason castro winning it. HAHAHA. EH, babe, if you didnt notice, David cook had REALLY bad hairstyling when he first entered the competition. He had a red streak. WTHHHH is a red streak??! HAHA. and his hir didn improve towards the end of the show but i thought that he had the best hairstyle come the finale, when it was dark brown. But hey, Castro had cool hair before and after the show. and he has mesmerising blue eyes and raises he eyebrows when he sings like me when i get exciting (remember: class fun pic?? EEKZZZ!) So, no, David cook is NOT cooler than Jason castro. OHOHOH, and Jason castro is soooo much more humble than David cook. and did i mention???? David cook has a tummy. HAHAHAHAH. A slightly curved outwards one. HAHAHA. Oh dear, i just got listed on the burn list of ALL David Cook fans. Sorry, girls and boys, sorry to break it to ya, Im still a Jason Castro fan and hey, i'll be somewhere over the rainbows when he (and if he does) release a single or album.

Okay, i wanna bathe. Time to gte ready for school and General Paper. WOOHOO. Wish me all the best. CIOWZEDD.

errr.. What was that again?

2008-05-18T08:53:00.000-07:00

im like a totally blanked out now, and i have yet to do my econs essay. I truly truly feel life has been sucked out of me.

I feel almost depressed. OMGOSSHHH. So sad can.

Im like watching JoBro vids to make me feel better but quality is so poor, i would no sooner simply pluck out my eyeballs. Kill me.

Lit is hell. Paracelsus is a such a good guy and so amazing that researching and reading about him is NOT a chore but linking it directly to themes of DOM is so difficult and mine is super weak. I dunno what to do. Im getting Ilham to help me out now. OH IM SO BOTHERSOME PLEASE.

I feel needy now. =( who knew sunday nights could be SO depressing. Im off to my sad depressing state of mind.

I cant think of one inspirational thing to say. LOSERRRRR larh, syuhhhh.

I'll show you something to make you change your mind

2008-05-17T08:22:00.000-07:00

Ive been stuck on the computer for 8 straight hours doing this lit video thing. Im so proud of myself, cos i thought i did a good job but who knew it could be SOOOOOOOO time-consuming.

DIEDIEDIE.

Im so lethargic, ive not watched teevee, ive not eaten a proper dinner tho i dont really feel hungry, and did i mention, my degrees just rocketted to sky high levels? OHMYMY.

And to top it off, my face is breaking out like nobody's business. Well, it is nobody's business but.. YOU GET THE POINT. URGH. not one, not 2 but i think is 3 or 4 HUGE ones. And one that is impeccably on my nose. @*$@*!(!))!*#*@&%

Yeah, thanks a lot.

RJC Sem went well. I totally adore RJ's campus. And their school badge. Let me tell you, thats something to be proud of, man. The school is huge and all GREEN. Okay, that part is not good, but seeing them makes me miss WRS' Skirt. Innova's skirt is damn -. I shant elaborate.

The CJ team was okay. But i had really bad butterflies. HAHAH. I was stumbling on my words but i kept looking at Mr Mahmood for reassurance. So, it made me feel slightly better throughout my part.

that lit vid is only 33% uploaded! ARGHHHHHH. My group better like the vid, i think i had some errors in there but if i have to edit it, i might just blow my top. SERIOUSLY.

I just want to watch teevee after this, then maybe wake up at 5 to study if my lazy bum aint too lazy. LOL.

Cheers.

Weary eyes and half-hearted hearts

2008-05-16T08:46:00.000-07:00

This week went by fast but it was so exhausting. I was rushing to keep up to all my schoolwork, and not to mention the imploding pressure of the (dont say it!) PRELIMS. Save me the dread people. You know what im talking about. And Nik Tay, dont you switch on you teevee now! HAHAAHHA

Anyway, the pressure of Prelims is setting in. veryone doesnt quite sure it but more and mroe are studying and when you as them, its always the same reaction "Theres jsut not enough time" OH MY MY. Arent we all praying for a miracle? Well, pray harder, cos the only miracle youre gonna get is if you start now.

I just did cards for my Hist RJC Sem thing. I swear my eyes are so weary already. OMGOSSSHHH. Im so worried for Mel. You rarey have to worry for her cos shes always so cheery but today, she really did look tired and exhausted. I wished i could do more to help her but i DONT know what. =(

Wish my the best for tmr. Other than that, i skipped Floorball trainings (BOTH!) this week, but went for the runs. AND, basketball was so much fun with the girls (except nic Tan and Safa) with James GHW and Ian. They are so amusing, and i ahve no idea how basketball managed to loosen up those screws in my head.

I should jet, ive to be in school by 7 freaking am. That doesnt even make sense especially since its saturday morning. WHERE IS THE SENSE, PEOPLE? RJ people are CRA-ZIEEEEE! Okay, enough. Night, world. And to all my sick friends, GET WELL SOON and study hard over this 3 day break, friends! <3

PROM and all the frills`

2008-05-11T07:02:00.000-07:00

Ive yet to ask my dad but i asked mum and she was like okay. Enjoy yourself and passed me the money immediately. Which is really strange, i expected her to be more questioning BUT... now, i dunno if my friends are going, even Mun Ling. so, neither am i confirmed going, i guess.

Or well, its just PROM. Just one of those things... a disaster, or a night to remember.

its better to have said too much than to never say what you need to say

2008-05-11T05:07:00.000-07:00

i was listening to a song on the radio with those lyrics and its just hit me, really hard.

Ive been thinking a lot about my emotions today. And no, im not bawling my eyes out. BUT, i feel so, wow-ed by these emotions. I think sometimes, you forget to feel. And you jsut go about your day, trying to make it past asap. But today, the sms i received from Aza made me think. The wish i told my mum made me think. The work i did made me think. The Desperate Housewives Marathon episodes made me think. They all made me THINK about my emotions. And i realised that ive been paying so much attention to my emotions. Like its always second, cos i always want to jsut get thorugh the day w/o being so swarmed with emotions.

Aza's sms made me feel so thankful about being part of the team. Like i truly have learnt to appreciate making friends with them. that maybe, they could jsut be more than my hi-bye friends. They could be my friends i turn to when i feel frustrated about training clashing with academics, and they know how it REALLY feels. And it amazes me how Aza doesnt even like to be complimented instead, she takes the bullet for us, even Mr Tan's bullets. And the love i have for playing with Siti and Ayuni, and my closer friendship with Lela and some of the juniors. I mean, the lost bonded us. Cos we were all comforting each other. And some of us cried and we were jsut all there to share the blame. I'd be lying if i said the game is all passe at this point. ITS SO FAR FROM PASSE. I dunno. Maybe, im thinking too much. But, honestly, i jsut visited the IJ floorball blog, and i love the cheer, i love the message put up there, i love the lame jokes starsky shares and i jsut love IJ Floorball.

Maybe its about time i played the sport because i love the sport, instead of because i want to get into the team, or because i REALLY want to be an attacker.

Maybe nik tay's right, that i should jsut play it cos i love it, because then, losing wont be so hard cos you know you'll jsut get better all because you love the sport.

i knew the song was sung by the wise and mellow John Mayer: Say what you need to say. God bless you, Mayer.

What doesnt kill you, makes you STRONGER

2008-05-10T02:08:00.000-07:00

i know thats just so cliche. But, its true isnt it?

The friendly against Yishun ITE went really bad. We lost 10-5. I was a defender. I swear, im going to imporve as a defender. I think there are jsut too many attackers, so i have to compromise and play defender. So i must improve either way. Its just really confusing having to change my mindset from attacker to defender, cos they are two different roles. And frustrating too. But, hey, im not complaining. I love playing for my team, and if i have to defend, i will. I'll have to work harder and improve my defending techniques, definately.

Yishun ITE was okay. I mean, they were pretty foul-mouthed, and that means not just saying shit, and no, i didnt hear the f-word, but you do hear sarcastic things which as a floorball player, is jsut basics. Like no high stick, and i bet if i didnt shout at the ref, i wouldnt have been given the free hit. But i because i said "Eh, thats so a high stick" the girl commented "Dont let your stick get in he way then" ERHHH.. i refuse to elaborate. But they were pretty decent, you cant judge a team with just a match right?

But i am humbled by the experience. truly am. You can never underestimate your opponent. Anyhow, i wanna get to bathing and studying. the match has been running thorugh my head again and again, like how i managed to let 2 goals in and a free hit, when it did hit me? i broke down after the match cos i was jsut so disappointed in myself. We jsut did defending training yesterday, and it all seems ineffective. I guess we just need more practice. Jamie will be so disappointed. I would hate to see him on Wednesday. Oh wait, i might not be coming, cos i have the history sem. =) OOOOOOO... and i get to see atikah syarah! AHAHAHHAAH.

Dont mistaken my happy tone, im still darn disappointed with how i played, and im determined to improve.

she had so much SOUL.

2008-05-09T16:17:00.000-07:00

Listening to Homecoming~Kanye West feat Chris Martin

Im so damn tired. DAMN TIRED. Im love this song. I love chris martin. I think he is such a wonderful songwriter and vocalist. British and having a sell-out album -10freaking million- OMG.

Anyhow, yesterdays training was really good. I thoroughly enjoy trainings with coach, its usually really tiring, but its so fruitful. You learn so many things, and you just come out of futsal at the end of the day, being a better player. But, practicing it in futsal and DOING it during a match is two VERY different things. Im having a frendly in less than 4 hours? Yes, im quite nervous, its against Yishun ITE. YEsterday, coach taught us the flick and defending again. Too bad there was only 8 people! SO, it was a very "intimate" training. AND YES, OH THANK GOD, i got to play as an attacker! OMGOSHHH. Im seriously soooo happy! =D I feel so comfortable in that role, but i realise that even as an attacker, i still have to defend so, its going to be tough but hey, im going to try my best! =) I jsut hope my stamina doesnt fail me again like it did last week. =(

Talking about the week, the week, went by surprisingly fast. IT was a good week, pretty tiring, but it was a good week nonetheless. I really pity the teachers, they are all falling ill and taking MCs! On thursday, we had 2 hrs free period due to the absence of Mr Mahmood and Mr Paul Chow. Then on Friday, Mr Pang didnt come though we did have homework that we failed to churn out. Oh my.. i feel so guilty.

Im feeling so jittery. Dont know why. Maybe cos i woke up at 5.30 to do math tut 22B? OH GOD. dont remind me, im waaayyy behind. should have begun revising earlier, and now its likewe're at 23B now. Im 2 tuts behind! Done for man, i am going to finsih my math tuts this weekend, by hook or by crook and prepare Q 1-5 so My pang wont kill me come Monday. I hope that is possible? Oh geez, i totally forgot the fact its saturday, it feels like friday doesnt it? Maybe cos i slept early last night. I was in bed by 8.30 then was thinking if i should study, but decided to study at 5 instead. I was so worn, and the bed, was so damn inviting. YUP, miss procrastination was by my side again.

FYI, prelims is in 2 weeks. Gippy anyway, but nicole tay said i should prepare for it like it was in 2 weeks. Im turning a ghostly white and my stomach jsut did a 360 at the thought. You know, im going to bring monetary policy for training! LOLX!

Tell you a bout results if i get the time to! See you.

p.s: BABE, tell me about it.

Do you, do you, got a first aid kit, baby?

2008-05-03T03:45:00.000-07:00

to my Babe,

i read your entry. And i know youre fine, hmmm.. trying to maybe? Im not trying to make this public, but babe, maybe this is not the time. Maybe, another time another place? When things a lot less stressful.

Right now, priorities are important. Its your last year, i think we all shouldnt be so occupied with the less important things in life, but focus on our friends, studies and yourself. Make time for yourself, babe. =)

I love you, and i jsut thought that you should know, if you need someone to talk to, i'll be there. Weekends are tight but that doesnt mean i cant make time for you when things get rough and confusing for you.

I hope you'll know whats important and what YOU need. And perhaps focus on that. =) The other things can wait, you know. So just be patient.

I love you.

Seriously larh, i just put a suckky pic of myself on my very own blog. OMGOSSSSH. HAHA.

Victory is sweet, but Memories are sweeter

2008-05-02T05:36:00.000-07:00

When youre in the week, and its Wednesday, the week seems to be long, draggy, unbearable, but now, its friday (TGIF), and i suddenly feel the week has passed a little too fast?

But it was nonetheless, another tiring, exhausting week, and as mch as i hate the tot of Week 7 being down, Im so glad im sitting in front of the computer and finally got down to blogging the week.

I have to say, though tiring, this week was sooo amazing. In every single way. Again, we celebrated our LAST sports day. Can you believe it? NO MORE SPORTS SAY! i have to admit im sad at the tot. =( Dont you feel the same way?

The atmosphere Wednesday eveining, was amazing. It was electrifying, nerve-wrecking, joyous, spirited, and amazingly wonderful. The floodlights, the cheering, the cup, the rivalry between houses, the red (brain-surgery) bull shirt. It was all perfect.

I won 8x50. got in second place. I was secretly aiming for first but got cut in the curve. Nevermind, it was just a great finish altogether. Im so porud of my team that was made up of Lydia, Melissa Maniam, Melissa Tan, Han and erm.. a few more girls.

And then, the icing on the cake, Taurus won the Annual Sports Event. Oh.. as usual. HAHA. Okay, KIDDING! But i was extremely exhilarate when they announced it and i was jumping up and down, and Taurus was going CRAZY. Literally. But i was nice to be able to share this with all my friends. Too bad i didnt really get to cheer much cos i was stuck under the tent most of the time waiting to run. =( but i got to cheer a hell lot after that. It was so nice, when the whole student body settled down, sweaty, shaken, and yet high-spirited awaiting the results. We were all doing our own cheers and flags were waved high. How momentous.

Finally, pictures! Courtesy of Safarina. For more visit her LJ! =D

However, not all red teams are meant to be victorious. At about 5am thursday morning, Liverpool lost to Chelsea and away goal, no thanks to Riise, proved decisive. Hoever, i still feel that Liverpool can walk out of Stamford Bridge with their heads held high. Im so proud of them, that it almost teared me to see them fail to meet their goal with just a goal needed and perhap, jsut a few more minutes to bring the game into our hands. Im so proud, of Liverpool.

And torres, a final for you this year, seems but a vision now, but i hope that vision holds strong till next season. I hope to see you marching the Reds to the finals, heads held high and spirited, confident.

For now, let us look forward. Improve on skills and internal structures, we are not our strongest yet. We may not be the Champions of Europe, but we have been for 5 times, thats more than Man United, Chelsea even. And YOU are victors in the hearts of the fans like me, as i saw you fight, down to the wire, and i was praying somehow, something would happen, and then a lifeline by babel but, it was not meant to be. and my heart broke, but carra youre right, we will heal from this heartache.

I will remember that moment, the moment we had to walk out of Stamford Bridge.

Better news, training went well, my shoots improved but my match fitness still needs imporvement. I need to run more. SADLY. I could barely up to Farhanah. =( So, i need to do something about that.

Tmr is the Friendly. Im excited! I hope it wont be demoralising. At least Coach will be there. =)

Im out. The weeks been great, but im jsut glad its another closed chapter.

going into overdrive

2008-04-28T09:32:00.000-07:00

My mind id going into overdrive. I just did a horrendously sloppy work for my RJC Essay. What am i thinking. Im not gonna prove this smartass people wrong if i give a sloppy essay to present. NONONO. Im gonna find the time to edit it later, for not, im dozing infront of the computer screen and i REALLY need sleep cos im running 2.4 tmr for FB morn training.

Yes, morn trainings are on again. and now, there are 3 rainings per week. Just the thought of it weakens me. I dont even know what to think of it. Oh my my. Im not even done with the ASEAN way case study due for consult tmr.

And tmr there is relay practice at 6pm right before the real run?! OMGOSSSSHHH. And how the hell am i gonna find the time to do my RJC essay! BOOHOOOO.

Im being a baby complaining so late into the night. I cant help now, can i? I jsut want to bury myself in my pillows now. Goodnight world, and please give me strength for tmr dear god.

its too late baby, theres no turning around~

2008-04-25T22:17:00.000-07:00

So just take a deep breath.

Hello Helloh.

Its my 200th post. I should be more excited than this shouldnt i. But i shant even bother feigning excitement cos im jsut mentally, physically worn. I dont want to complain so, dont take this as a blabber boring post kay! Its a refresher. =)

Anyway, the week started off alright, except for the shocker whereby Mr Mahmood told us we were going to have a test on Friday that very week for 5 topics in which ~~ridiulously~~ only one one Q will be coming out. SIGHHHH. Panic attack can? Cos thurday we were having econs international trade test. Goodness.

But thankfully, after telling Mr Mahmood our dire situation, he cut us some slack and told us the Q was going to be on China! WOOHOO. my topic! =)

Econs test wasn well done simply because i took a long time doing the 10m q and only managed to write one and a half pages for my 15m q. Dammit! =( That test was pretty manageable.

The week wore on as i only had barely 5-6 hours of sleep a day and that sure as hell sint enough. I found myself dozing off towards the last 20mins of math lecture, but economics was harder to doze off thanks to the extreme fast pace the lecturer went to finish up foreign exhange and guess what?! She didnt even complete it and we have to do the reading ourselves. GREAT RIGHT?

Then thursday was relay practice till 7+pm. Ohmygosh. We practiced till it drizzled and went all dark that you jsut sufficiently see the figure running towards you. It was tough because we kept on running to fast or too slow for each other and thus the passing of the baton(??) was really bad. And the "heats" which was really to fight for lane position on Wednesday was to on Saturday. I came to school again on fri at 7.15 to practice relay. SIGHHHH. lack of sleep again.

Then, photo-taking with class was really fun! I love my class despite the shit we go thorugh, no thanks to the boys. but it seems the class numbers shrank and only 4 boys made it and 10 10 girls? Humourous, i know. Then i was time to start on the RJC seminar history project. sigh, there were so many road blocs, but im glad i working with Melissa, shes so easy-going and that makes working with her a little less pressuring. I just couldnt wait to get home but not before checking out the taurus house dance/cheer! WOOHOOO. I think its ncier than last year though the transition from position to position was extremely messy but there are more stunts and more cool moves. HAHA. I cant wait for 30th April. It will be a great night. Something to remember from 2008.

Then came saturday. Leg cramps and NJC friendly at ValHall. SO the plan was to complete heats then, head to Valhall for friendly but my heats ended so late like, 10.15 am and training-cum-friendly was to end at 11am. Im HIGHLY disappointed. I really wanted to be part of the squad. the feeling of not playing is soooo disappointing, i was looking forward to it cos coach was going to be there and i really wanted to have a feel of a porper match. But i guess i will have to wait for the next friendly? I hope so.

Anyway, the heats didnt go too well. I tot i was too fats for Ada to catch up but apprently she didnt feel her best due to the netball match the day before. So, we were ermm last *coughs*. So, what was i talking about again? HAHA. Oh, i was very anti-social and emotional too. There was a point i felt like crying, and i dont know why. thank goodness they called for 4x100 right after so i dint have to deal with these emotions for too long. it was pretty boring but it was so nice to see he 8 by 50. HAHA. amusing even cos everyone was so scterred and now, you have the baton, now, you dont. That kind of speed. HAHA. I want to congratulate Nik and Lydia and many other taurus people who did so well. But, i hope we'll have more cheering to do come wednesday evening.

But i hope we'll train again and be more prepared and focussed on Wedsnesday cos i feel we can really run as the team really has the heart for it. By the way, my team consists of Ada, myself, Jia ling and Nami. So, i'll be looking forward to Wednesday evening and will be expecting a tougher competition. =)

My right thigh is hurting. SIGH. I love sprinting. I wished they did that more often for pe. Okay, i dont im great or even half as good as nik, but i mean, the adrenaline pumping and the speed youre going, its jsut mind-blowing. Too bad this will be the last sports day, i'll ever be part of. I hope it'll be filled ith memories man. all my freinds, and Taurus cheers and screams. Safa, bring on SIRENS. nic, bring on the spirit. and mel, take care of yourself! WOOHOO.

Okay, im going to do history and then maybe sleep then study, then watch soccer tonight at 10pm.

overall the week was good but exhausting. i dont think i can take this kind of exhausting week two weeks in a row but i think its possible since we'll be training for relay soon. Oh my my.

That's what you get when you let your heart win

2008-04-20T07:48:00.000-07:00

its sunday. And im suppose to spend the last hour of my sunday before 11pm revising international trade but im online chatting to a good friend, Zhi Xiang, and getting pics from him. Im really testing the patience of time. I think all Zhi Xiangs are nice people arent they? Yup. I think so.

Anyhow, mun ling called after my heart-wrenching moment and we talked for an hour plus. she was having this small fit with aveil and i was jsut bumming around my study room trying to think of somethg to do online. So, hey misery loves company.

Anyhow, i think im truly addicted to The Audition and Danny. Altho i think he looks like a dracula cos he has these "fangs-like teeth!". CREEPY. but he is soo nice. He almost said no to the band cos he didnt want to quit school and bcos of his girlfriend. AWWWWWW. but he did anyway. HAH!

Also, well, theres no also. Actually i wanna watch Paramores new vid called "That's what you get". It looked really like Paramore before they could afford all those expensive "Misery business" video. and it has a very interesting line in it, which is somewhat pessimistic. Which is the title of my entry. dont you think thats just scary?

What really happens when you let your heart win?

dumb act to follow

2008-04-19T04:20:00.000-07:00

My brother did the most stupid thing today.

He deleted his desktop in hopes of removing what he thought was his documents that was causing major pop-ups problems. What kind of loser thinks that way? Tell me? Please tell me.

In the process of completing his stupid retarded act... My folder was on his desktop thus he ended up deleting that too.

I reiterate, what kind of loser thinks of removing pop-up problems by deleting his whole desktop?

I am fucking angry and ive been crying since i heard his dumb, foolish, retarded act.

It truly is retarded, and you say that you are good in all things computer related and youre studying design tech!

My folder effing consisted pics of school, my friends and even the bbq 32A. All those are gone. How can i not be pouring my eyes out now.

Really. who he hell things that way???!!??!

and the worst thing is... he didnt even say sorry. He smirked a little defended himself a little and continued strumming.

I hope God gives me the patience to see his face without rearranging it today and tmr.

seriously, dhow umb can you possibly get??

draw a new breath, i swear i'll show you.

2008-04-18T20:25:00.000-07:00

The week started prettp poorly. but it just kinda got worse. But, it ended pretty well, in school thanks to YOGA. Yes, i went for a YOGA enrichment programme planned by the REd Cross Scoiety in our school. It ISNT as bad as yu think, they actually brought in a professional. That was really good. He thought us proper breathing and some postures. Im so glad i went for it,at the expense of Floorball training. Anyhow.

My GP teacher pissed me off today. I dont even want to go into it, but seriously, if it wasnt for my poor grade thus the need of his help and the thought that he will be my teacher till october, i would have seriously told him off for his poor handling of the whole situation. What the hell. Freakin piss now thinking about it.

Im so glad Saosin are breaking into the sinagpore scene. Its about time, well, it should have been looong ago since they are absolutely fab. When i was listening them which was one or 2 years ago, nobody here knew about them. Which i couldnt understand cos they made great music with Voices and even Youre not alone, my favourite song from them. Im just glad they are here finally. America actually has many great bands that havent broken into the Singapore scene.. which is sadd. I think over here its more of a hip hop, rnb pop scene. Im currently listening to the audition, and i think they are really good too. HAHA. Anyhow, if youre interested, some bbands i'd recommend would be all time low, we the kings, the audition, the almost, story of the year and lostprophets. I need more good bands, maybe i shall browse thorough myspace later.

Im trying to catch a movie but all the quality sucks. GOSSHHHH.

OH, i forgot to mention, i met Nuresah and her love on thursday. and i smelt like crapp larh thanks to the long day! Also, i met that funny zhi xiang? LOL. dunno how to spell. and he was mocking me cos i sighed when mures wnate to take pcs. And he was saying "imagine this. Your husnabd says 'syuhrah sweetheart, lets take our wedding pictures, and you sighed (with action somemore)' and we all jsut burst out laughing like 7pm near a street lamp! How ridiculous. But it was so nice to see them all again. i shall post pics soon! =D

i wanna jet off. I dont feel like myself today, at least the audition is making me feel better. *major sigh*

Im in LOVE with how you feel

2008-04-14T05:16:00.000-07:00

I literally feel like life has been sucked out of me. I didnt notice how tired i was until the bus ride home. GEEZ. I was so hungry i jsut ate w/o bathing and everyone was jsut reminding me of how i smelt and i was jsut like "Let me eat first can..."

To make things worse, the bus ride home was one of the worse by far. WTHHHH. This couple was like trying to smooch and i think that they are seriously out of their minds! This is a public bus, and for god's sake, external cost incurred by me! =S not to mention they were in lower sec. SIGHHHH.

SANITY, where art thou??

And you whats the worse part of all this??

Its just MONDAY.
I swear... @#$^*%##&!#^*$@#$^&#@!^*(.

Okay, im off to construct a proper conclusion for my history essay.

wake up where the clouds are far behind me...

2008-04-12T07:51:00.000-07:00

about 5 minutes ago, my brain was all mushhy, no thanks to Permutation and Combination, affectionately known as P&C. (economics joke: affectionately known as ERP!)

and im online now to help out with the history essay.

but now, im all calm, because i watched Jason Castro sing 3 times, and began blogging. WOW. im in a more peaceful state. That was a good song, Castro. I really hope you'd do this week in and week out. David "POMPOUS" Cook wont stand a chance for final 2 if you sing this way! Keep singing from your heart and please, dont do anything mediocre. PLEASEEEE, youre waaayyyy better than that.

Okay, personal msg to Castro over. and dont you dare say it wont reach him, the power of advance tech, you may never know!

Anyway, math jsut totally made me realise, that im not ready for the week's test. HUGE RESIGNATION. okay. Got to stop wallowing in self pity and try again tmr morning. When these questions are tough, they are really tough. Its crazy!

Anyhow, im off already larrhhh okay, i think N!k's spying somewhere! HAHAH. KIDDING! =P

i want to go where the bluebirds fly.

to Gossip or not to gossip!

2008-04-11T09:03:00.001-07:00

i jsut got off the phone with Babe. we talked for the longest time since, forever? And i truly miss it.

I remember, i'd call her when my minds at the edge, and how we'd pull through all the tough times, when college seems unbearable.

I miss her a lot. then, i could jsut turn 45 degrees and see her talking to ahmad afzal but now, its always a sms or call away. We barely get to meet but i cant complain. I'd rather have her here than in PJ anytime.

So to babe, goodnight. I hope we managed to keep each other in tune to the ever frenzied pace of college life, gossips or not.

I love you a lot, and i care for you. Just thought you should know, in case your STM kicks in anytime soon.

Cheers to the year and the hardship!

A little too precious to lose

2008-04-11T06:16:00.000-07:00

We don’t have time left to regret
It will take more than common sense
So stop your wondering take a stand
Theres more to life than just to live

a little less than perfect.

that is how i'd sum up this week. Altho' training was amusing before TRAINING really started. Dont ask me, lets jsut say, if youre from IJ and i dont know you, and youre reading my blog, please DONT tell me that youre reading my blog. I feel invaded, and i really would rather not know. Call me ignorant, i'll call you K-PO CHIPPP. Okayokay, just kidding. But just dont tell me, i have this ridiculously irritating syndrome called panic hysterium (make sense of it yourself) and i really cannot exist in such a state for more than 20 secs, if i do, i start gasping, and you dont want to see me gasping! HAHAH. Got it?? Awesome! =D

Anyhow, the week started off fine with the medal presentation, and i just read Su's tag, and totally laughed! HAHA. niche people are evil huh - except YOU. LOL. so much for "there's no I in team"! My friends were saying they could see my pink clip from far.. Haiyo. Of all days to clip my hair. At least my exaggerated speech was read! HAH! And as much as i think niche CCAs are overrated, i still support them in winning tournament, okay su! You can count on that. But seriously, the boys soccer team, they jsut lost 2-0 top serangoon. uhh....??

And finally the trilogies, of trilogies - the finale. Liverpool VS Arsenal in the ultimate clash. OH MY MY. dont you just love waking up at 2.30am and watching a football match for 2hrs, holding your breath, anticipating for the whistle in extreme exhilaration. That just spelt wednesday morning. The feeling was great as Pool won 4-2 with the atmosphere beyond words. My dad and I were high - fiving furiously! I was prancing on the couch, that my bro had to warn me of the fan. I would hate to lose my head... GET IT GET IT???

But, the week started to wore on, as usual. I cannot believe i signed up for 4x100. Somebody, tell me why??? Why did i let Lydia Mak do this to me?? -.-

And then, the much awaited PeeDoubleEWWW results came out. Im not elated, overjoyed, and all those nonsensical overrated words, but i am satisfied. Alhamdullilah. My group put up a pretty alright(??) performance, with 3 Bs and 2Cs. Sighh.. i really worry for my friends but i jsut hope this will spur them on and encourage them to do better in their H2s. All The Best guys. Babe got Bee too. And i was glad she agreed that it was all too "mediocre". SIGHHH. I jsut want this to be a learning lesson though, i will never ever want to experience PeeDoubleEWWW ever again. Im sure i'll face something worse in the working world though, but by then, i hope i'll be good enough a leader and a little less emotional? Ive to work on those two qualities.

I told Aveil he sucks cos he got an A. Ive yet to meet this guy but if anyone can make my Babe smile, perhaps even better than i can, deserves props and some "You suck" moments. LOL. He sounds nice, babe, you never needed my approval.

NAPHA is over, and i think a gold is within my reach. I hope. I never was into getting Gold for NAPHA in secondary school, so im glad im a changed person, more fit then i ever was then.

Come to think of it, ive changed quite a bit. i think so anyway. But ive half a year and more to go to see the absolute transformation of me. More pimples? more wrinkles? i hope thats from laughing with my friends. I think, mostly i jsut want to learn to appreciation every second i got. i think its a little too precious to lose?

Ive got to hand in my essay to nik tay in 1hr 15 mins and i know she'll kill me when she reads this but ive not got down to writing a single word. I deserve to be beheaded like the Duchess.

Okay gotta ciowxed. the duchess' death is indeed a watershed, i wonder if my death will be.

And i think its okay to cry when you feel low.
Its okay to smirk when you dont like him
Its okay to be quiet when you want to be left alone.
Its okay to be honest with me cos you know, i'll take it in for you.

and you never were a burden. Im just sad you never knew.

Because the best things in life... you dont expect.

2008-04-06T06:21:00.000-07:00

I had the jitters.

"Come on girls. You can do it!"

I had jitters - still.

I went on the pitch, looked apprehendingly at Ayuni and Siti. And i thought "Well, i have to do my best, they won, we'll have to win this too."

There goes the whistle.

"Siti, right!"

SHOOTS.

I scored one for the team. Okay, im sure there were better goals during all our matches, but this is my blog so i wanted to highlight mine. Cannot issssittt?? HAHAH. Besides, it was a good assist from Siti. And i am so happy about the partnership Siti, ayuni and I have carved jsut during the past few days. Not to mention, the lost of 7-0 at the hands of Coach. HURH. But we played well, and finished the game 1-0. Sweet victory for me. And ~~Bedok Resrvoir Punggol CSC~~ IJ girls went on to beat RJC, And TJC 3-0 and 2-1 respectively. Making us top the group with 9 points! then it was quater-finals where we went head on with RJC's other team Hera and beat them... hmm.. i cant remember! 2-0?

Sadly, we crashed out in Semis. Lost our composure when we trailed by one (tyco) goal. Okay, i shouldnt say that, i missed out 2 opportunities to settle the game thanks to my fumbling attics. GEEZ. What a waste. But we werent totally out of the game, we still could fight for third position! HURRAH. And we did. Those girls from northbrooks were vicious! Their defender was really fierce. I had to really push her to the corner to try to get the ball, and even then, i failed and she was given a corner cos there was too mcuh shoving. =( We managed to come out with a zero all and it was down to penalties. Thank god i was substituted out earlier. I didnt have to take the penalties. And im proud to say, our Captain Aza managed to clinch that 3rd spot for us! HURRAH! =D

I will be expecting a tougher challenge come A-divs. Oh the jitters! Oh my... but im glad to have a medal.

And heres to the niche sport in our school, in your face.

so not kelakar!

2008-04-03T06:32:00.000-07:00

*so not funny, translated

i just completed a 13 marks economics essay and now im re-doing my best essay which is worth 25 marks. i am seriously worn. the thought of having to do ANOTHER essay after this 25 marks essay jsut irks me. OMGGGOSSSHHH. i should stop looking out for eye candy and start getting down to reading more articles of Gippy and Economics. SIGHHHH.

I jsut wanted to complain. Im sorry if i wasted your time. I just wasted mine too. And now, im off. Econs consultation tmr and i have no idea if i want to go for training though my heart says go! my head and body is just like... you rest.

I finally know the technicalities of a wrist-shot, thanks to Jamie. LOL.

two way monologue

2008-03-29T03:27:00.000-07:00

two way monologue by sondre lerche.

Im so wornnn... been stuck on the com doing economics essay! I know i should be happy but, my eyes hurt badly and i need a break, but beofre that, let me blog.

I finally passed Economics. and im ever so proud of my case study. 16/30. WOW. ive never gotten that. I swear my face was like in shock when safa passed it to me. HAHA. I was so overjoyed. But, safa didnt do too well, so she was pretty bummed. Thats goes the same to Mun Ling. Dont worry dears, you guys will do better. Just dont give up and keep pressing on okay. Anyhoos, since passing, im more motivated to do better for economics. Im was so thankful to Ms Wang for setting up consultations for our class. I feel that shes been so dedicated and i say "BRAVO!" to her. If she doesnt give up on us, we shouldnt give up on ourselves too. So 32A, pick yourself up and lets jsut head forward! =D

As for my other results, i passed GP but failed math by a freaking 7%. WTHHH. Im always close but never close enough, and at closer inspection, its all thanks to careless mistakes! HMPHHH. youve got to be kidding me. I think im hanging out too much with Lydia! HAHAHA. Kidding ahhh, Lydia Mak. Im jsut gonna do better and keep practicing, ive still not lost faith. Prelim 1 will be different, for all of us.

I love Mr chow. He is so cool and funny. I love that he picks on Plavin Singh. Okay, sometimes its a little over the line, but hey, all in the name of fun right? Palvin seems to enjoy him too, well, at least i think so. Remember, violent love, safa?!
We've not gotten back Lit and History. I think we'll get lit by monday but not sure about history, since there is this moderation thing? OMGOOOSH. we were suppose to get it on Friday larh. SPOILER.

In other news, Castro was bottom 3. SERVES HIM RIGHT. He obviously doesnt really care thats why he is not putting in the amount of effort that he is so capable of. Mediocre songs, bad strumming, the lists goes on! I'd rather be a david cook fan at this rate! SO PLEASE CASTRO, have a good Top 9(??) week please, for your fans like myself. Get out of that safety zone and do something more lively instead of mellow songs! PLEASEEEE! *on knees*

SIGHHHHH.

OH, road run was massively a great memory. Not only did the boys not come, but it was a great run, and taurus was wonderful in spirit! B-E-A-T, Beat them (echo)/ B-U-S-T Bust them/ Beat them, bust them/ Thats out custom/ Come on Taurus, Readjust them! WOOOHOOOOOO. I dont think we'll win the marathon but we have a good chance of winning the cheerleading competition, man. Safa and I had great fun screaming and making "sirens"! HAHAHAH. i was laughing till i teared in the LT. Everybody was looking at Safa! OH MYYYY. It was so amusing! I got a towel, so thats a good sign, but i didnt record timing, so haha, aza is soooo gonna kill me, come wednesday. Running the distance was so much beter than on the track! It didnt seem as never-ending. I have to congratulate Caroline for coming in first too. She's crazy, that girl. I wasnt even half way, and guess what? She was already on her way back! HAHAHA. We were all cheering her on. I wanna say WOOHOOO to Nic too for running her best! And to my girls who were competitive runners... you guys did soooo awesome for taurus! YAY-ness! Im still all high from yesterday, that i slept so soundly last night. I couldnt even wake up at 5 to study. Yeah, so im slogging it out tonight with revision and homework i guess.

Well, lets just say, i cant wait for Sports evening. the floodlights, the running, the cheering, the dance... that just spells great evening. Im starting to think, this year might not jsut be bad all around. Maybe, i will have memorable memories other than studying. Like playig UNO at the cafe and laughing at Nic for having to pick up what seems like 7483027293057273 cards! HAHAHA. Nicole, you rock! <3

Well, im done saying what i need to say. dont think i'll be coming online again. maybe tmr to continue with my other essays. SIGHHHHH.

Come on Taurus, readjust them!

half-hearted`

2008-03-28T05:26:00.000-07:00

it seems like ive sooo much to say. but nothing is really on my mind. The week has been soooo up-and-down-ssyyy, its a little weird. And to cap it off, im here watching Jonas Brothers videos. My favourite will have to be Nick Joe.

Oh sigh. i just dont feel like blogging. i should stop forcing myself to do so.

See ya!

in the best way that i can

2008-03-22T21:45:00.000-07:00

i need more up to date pictures man. I visited my photobuclet account and realised that the pictures were from England. SO I NEED MORE PICSSSS WITH MY FRIENDSSS. Hmm.. maybe the road run this friday?

OMG. talking about the road run.. ive been binge-ing like mad. Brownies, chicken, cheese balls, donuts you name it, i probably could have eaten it. SIGHHH. And today is 23rd march, that means the floorball comeptition is like next week.. *whispers: i need and excuse to get my ass out of there* Okay, stop being a coward, syuhh.

Anyhows, the much awaited SUNDAY is here.

1) GRAND SLAM SUNDAY is here. Man U VS Liverpool (1-2 or 1-0). Chelsea VS Arsenal (2-0). those are my predictions. Hey man, its a fight till the end! I cant believe theres only eight more matches before one of the 4 teams are crowned BPL champions.. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITHOUT BPL ON WEEKENDSSS?? Oh my. oh my.

2) Tmr is Monday! WOOOHOOOO. For some reason, i miss it. Maybe its the presence of my friends i miss. I just know i wont feel the same way when i stepp into school! Dont you just hate that feeling. LIKEEE.. omyyyygoddd. I have PE tmr.

3) Im jsut glad its sunday. For some reason, this week, sunday feels goood. No going out just chilling out. And im not studying.. yet. I met to do Econs yest.. but didnt quite get down to it. HAHAH. Hmmm.. maybe today? I doubt it but who knows? I might surprise myself.

Okay, gotta ciowxedd.. Dirty jobs is starting soon.

Did i mention? I love sunday, 23 march 2008?

Funny reviews and PUH-LEEZE! Castro still rocls!

2008-03-22T02:07:00.000-07:00

I was at the mtv overdrive website, and i saw reviews from the American Idol top 11 show. IT WAS SOOOO AMUSING, the reviews! Check it out.

Jason Castro
What He Sang: "Michelle"
What He Should Have Sung: "I Will"
Verdict: Très tragic! (translated: VERY tragic)

Jason followed up his awkward, hushed "If I Fell" with an awkward, hushed "Michelle." So what if he can't sing very well? He's so dreamy! Even Simon was charmed by the dread-head's goofy demeanor. But get past the hair, the smile and the sloppy French, and all that's left was a vocalist who was consistently ahead of the music, who couldn't hold onto any note for more than three seconds and who looked uncomfortable dancing onstage. Do we really need another Ashlee Simpson? (At least we know Jason doesn't lip-synch.)

Kristy Lee Cook
What She Sang: "You've Got to Hide Your Love Away"
What She Should Have Sung: "Flying"
Verdict: Help!

After last week's howler, I was hoping creepy animal-lover Kristy would pick "Flying" — a.k.a. the only instrumental the Beatles ever put on an album. But alas, we were stuck with "You've Got to Hide Your Love Away," a song she chose based on the title alone. (If that was her only criteria, how did she not end up with "Why Don't We Do It in the Road?") Exceeding last week's cacophony, Kristy elevated her performance to downright blasphemy, giving John Lennon's brilliant song a hideous Yanni-like arrangement. She saved face with a huge note at the end, but then immediately ruined it by saying to Simon, "I can blow you out of your socks," when a normal English-speaker would say, "blow your socks off." Big difference there, Dr. Doolittle.

Amanda Overmyer
What She Sang: "Back in the U.S.S.R."
What She Should Have Sung: "With a Little Help From My Friends" (Joe Cocker arrangement)
Verdict: Red scare

I'm officially over Overmyer. Amanda took Paul McCartney's tribute to the Beach Boys and performed it like she was the Vince Neil in an all-girl Mötley Crüe cover band. The aggressive seizure-inducing strobe lights didn't add anything to her performance either, other than fresh bite marks to wooden spoons across the States. After the judges responded with a shrug, the nurse got all WWE Diva on Simon and barked that she treats each weekly performance like a chance to sell concert tickets. Poor thing doesn't realize that nobody's purchased a ticket to a sleaze-rock hair-metal show in almost 15 years. Right, Bo?

HAHHAHAHAHAHA. i hope you guys got it. if you didnt... okay. As Jessica says DOTSSSSS. Gotta catch UCL magazine now. CIOWXEDD.

oh, shane sheckler... i like.

and ive got to stop smiling cos its starting to hurt...

2008-03-21T05:31:00.000-07:00

helloh helloh!

Im bored, and im on a mission. To find a new blog skin. But so far, to no avail. And WHYYYY am i doing so? cos i am bored. nothing to catch on youtube. and ive got a movie to catch actually BUT my bro is getting screamed at for fractions so i'd rather not be below.

Anyways, am chatting with Melissa Maniam, and talking about castro. I was online till 12++ yest and saught a vid of his younger days, with the SHORRRTTT dreads. he looks soooo different. Not as cutee, for one. and another, he looks so small built. BUTTTT, he still looks so goofy. I think i saw a prom pic with his tux and all... yup.. that looked good (he had long dreads then). the vid was sooo funny cos he was a time when he had a band, and wasnt singing yet. So he mocked his lead singer who was like recording. And it looked damn gay.. i kept rewinding to that minute, cos it was hilarious. and he was trying to stifle that laughter cos his lead singer was recording so didnt want to disrupt. HAHAHAAHAHAH. Im gleeing... can you just imagine me and my laughter. Okay, and i heard some of his own songs, and he sings alot of mellow songs... maybe, i'll put it some day (heheh.. one of the title of his songs).

OKAY, ENOUGH ABOUT JASON CASTRO ALREADDDDYYY, syuhhh.

Im so bored. something wrong with dad. like really wrong. but i dunno what. maybe its teaching my brother fractions? God knows.

Firefly, could you shine your light?

2008-03-20T07:11:00.000-07:00

I jsut came back from religious class in which we celebrated Maulud Nabi. And i realise that ive been quite happy lately, but i dont think i was peaceful. Theres a great difference isnt there? to be at peace with your life, with God.

She preached about what we have now is just temporary. Our life, doesnt even belong to us forever, because one day, God will take back what He created. All these is TEMPORARY. Doesnt that send shivers down your spine? It was not the first time for me, hearing that but everytime i do hear it, i makes me humble, and at awe of God's creation. In the end, its between you and God.

ANYHOOO, on a lighter note, exams have ended, at least for March. I dont know if i should be happy or concerned. Honestly, the papers were manageable, but i doubt i did well. After this will be PTM. Oh the dread, seriously.

Im suppose to hang out with ML tmr. Read her blog for the full story. LOL. I love my babe cos she did something really awesome for me. I love you, babe, more than *****. No offence dude! HAHAHAH.

I saw HIMMMM today. Just oozeddd with confidence larh. so envious can. HURH.

OHOHOH, JASON CASTRO is still in the running. WOOOOHHHOOOOOO. I tell you, that charming face and almost-perfect smile... my heart goes ---. I dont have to put it into words... you guys will be too gross out. HAHAH.

Its Good Friday tmr. A break! GREAT! I jsut wanna chill, with somebody or by myself, thats fiine. Just wanna chill. BADLY. I better stop blogging. Im running out of things to do online. SIGHHHH. maybe i'll play Solitaire. *whispers: no-lifer!*

Should just keep chasing Pavements?

2008-03-18T00:09:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to blog cos im OH-SO-GLAD that the block tests are almost over. Just one more H1 paper and im off... well, at least until the results. SIGGHHH.. i dont feel confident at all of my results. Somehow i wished i'd study harder, and not cram everything like at the last minute! So, i believe i could have done better. =( But, lets jsut see how it turns out. Im looking out for good songs... any recommendations? Just tag. im dying without good songs. Well, its so cold right now. I loved spending time with the girls today after lunch. nic couldnt join us cos of Chem test the next day and Siew En for Bio test after Econs. I have one day of rest, i shall spend my hours wisely! HEEEEHHH. =D

I look at all the lonely people

2008-03-13T07:21:00.000-07:00

i loovveeee john lennon and paul mccartney week! I REALLY DO. I have sooo much more appreciation for the beatles! Oh, thank you Jason Castro and David cook for wonderful renditions. I thoroughly enjoyed seeing you too! For once, cute David Archuleta chokedd.. poor dear, was so nervous he forgot his lines, but Castro did a slightly above average job with "If i fell" and Cook did an AWESOMEEEE job with "Eleanor Rigby" (my title). I swear i was smiling soooo hard during Castro's performance... he is so charming. SIGHHHH. I cannot wait to see him again next week. Ive started d/ling some beatles, and castro songs. WEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Anyway, i did a study schedule today. I really should do that more often. SIGHHH. math is on Monday, and i really am not prepared. I feel like Hist is gonna be okay, and i have a feeling mkt struct is gonna be a Case study, so i better read up! =D Anyway, im intending to clock pass midnight tmr since i heard parents sayng about movies tmr. I really want to watch Leap Years and Horton , OHOHOH, Spiderwick somethg. Theres that guy from chocolate factory. He has a bright future man... lets hope he does better than Lindsay.

Liverpool got a win at San Siro! WOOHHHOOO. Another torres goal. We are the fisrt team to beat them cos theyve been unbeaten 19 matches man. LIKEEEE WOOOOOWWW.

Anyhows, gonna d/l song and get to work. I really, tremendously, extremely, absolutely despise math. I cant do so many Qs and im gonna die when they give me the thinking Qs man... I can jsut imagine. GOODNESSSS.

p.s: sorry for the overload picstures of Jason Castro. I really really fancy him. but i think you get the point.

Imagine

2008-03-10T01:33:00.000-07:00

i truly appreciate John Lennon's song "Imagine". Its so beautifully wirtten. And i heard David Archuleta sing it, and he did an o-kayy job with it. I think the song truly resembles the "what ifs" in life. And im not going to be a skeptic and say thats its impossible for "the world (to) be as one". If travelling from country to country is already made possible, there souldnt be a reason for us not to help each other build up and be stronger. Sure its easier said than done. To share and not exploit. to help sincerely and not have those fine prints. I wonder, how everyone of us can make it possible? We shouldnt jsut be trying to save the Earth from climate change but also from war and pain. Wow. Imagine if the world could really do that.

I just chatted from ahmad, and i was kinda glad he was online. I was like "Youre back!" and he was like " Im not even half way through my journey!" and i was like "huh?" and he was like " Im in Rome!".

*dies and wakes up again*

OMGOSSSHHHH. Rome, as in Italy rome, as in collesuem Rome, as in GLADIATORSSSS?! HAHAHA. Then came the rush of questions and the i-cant-believe-youre-torturing-me-with these-details tone. HAHA. HE WENT TO NOU CAMP! AS IN BARCELONA's HOME FIELD!!!! I told him to tell me the price of the whole trip and start saving now. Maybe got chance to go with ML, if she isnt preoccupied with SOMEBODY. Worse come to worst, join Amazing race. HAHAH.

Well, as you can see, my mood has been lifted, a little. Was at consultation with Mr Pang and Safa then went for lunch with Mel and nic Tan and met Ng Mun Ling, my babe. And was off home.

Watched Real superhumans on discovery channel. I could not resist! It was a pretty cool show cos they was jsut plain not-so-ordinary humans. Withsatnd cold, draw tho he was born blind and... oh, see colours from music. SERIOUSLY. They were talking about how we humans have our own ability to create an evolution, by using the genes of these superhumans to be implanted to ordinary humans. Okay, i think firstly that what you have is god's gift, you either got it or dont got it. then, why try to create evolution when you can jsut let it happen naturally, i mean, there are so little surprises in life anymore. Just recently we read an excerpt on how parents can soon genetically change their children and remove unwanted characteristics such as being homosexuals. But, isnt that the art of being unique? Why should we have the power to do that when God created us? Okay, maybe this a totally religious point of view, but sure, if we can remove bad genes like the likeliness to have heart diseases, i would think thats pretty good, but removing what makes you unique, and having control, the colour of the eyes, hair and all, isnt that too much? The search of perfection cant go too far..

Anyway, did i mention, i want Jason Castro to win American idol? *scrolls up* Okay, i have not. SO, lets do that again. I WANT JASON CASTRO TO WIN AMERICAN IDOL 7. What can i say? He has dreadlocks. He can sing. He has nice eyes. He has this really good complexion that will put most girls to shame. Hes smart, studying in construction science major in texas (Something) University, he mumbled that bit. He has that very shy but confident look. AND DID I MENTION, he is oh-so hilarious!

HEY HEY, keep a lookout on Jason Castro! and those amricans better vote for him week in an out till he wins it.

CIOWXEDDD.

everybody's happy. Maybe i should try to be too.

Its Never too late.

2008-03-07T21:58:00.000-08:00

The world we knew
Won't come back
The time we've lost
Can't get back
The life we had
Won't be ours again

Im feeling down. Im still over getting an E for Malay. Whoever said that college students are perfect?? This is a dreadful stigma to live with. The labels of being academically inclined, the pressure to get into NUS, i truly hated every thing about yesterday. Part of me wished i could jsut erase it from my memory, and forget it ever happened, but then, i think about WHY God even let this happen to me, and i realised, that maybe this was a wake up call. A really tough smack to my face to just make me realise, that even though i tot i did okay enough to get a C but ended up with an E, what you think is not a fact.

I felt such great pain upon receiving my results and my dad's words jsut rang like some really spoilt alarm "Youre a quitter". I jsut cried, even in front of Mr Mahmood. All i thought to myself, was "What am i going to tell dad??". It was so hard, and jsut recalling the moment right now, brings tears to my eyes. I cried and i felt so overwhelmed with fear and shock. An E? What the hell am i going to do with an E?? Lets jsut say, i was having the worse crying stint after an exam.

I had my friends with me. ML came down from the 3rd storey to comfort me, and i thank her for it. All my friends were jsut telling me that MT is not important for my university admission, and i knew that. I knew it and thats why i said "What the hell is MT result?" the day before the release, and this definately has taught me to watch my mouth. They were all great comforts, but i jsut wanted to cry for awhile. I had the right to feel lousy at the disgraceful result (no offence to those who got E). Even Mr Mahmood helped my dad understand by talking to him. Im so grateful. Nevertheless, i cried cos i jsut felt so disappointed at myself. So frustrated even.

I dont want to feel this way next year, when im receiving the results that matter. I want to feel that ray of hope of getting into NUS and doing the course I WANT. I dont want to be at risk, i want to be secured. I want to be able to get out of the examination after every exam and feel i did my best, and confident. Im just so afraid for PW result now, I dont know what i'd do if i dont get the grade i tried so hard to work for. Well, i need to keep my head focussed on March Block tests first, and worry about PW when the time comes, that is, about one month later??

I thought about this on the bus ride home, i only have to work hard and just put my heart and soul into this one year. Its the only year that matters right now. If i dont get through successfully, there are no other years to think about. Its here and now. so might else well give it my ALL and do well. Stop questioning myself, and jsut do it. After all, this is the year i can define myself and my career options. I chose college cos i wanted more time to experience what i love and decide what i truly love and the prospect of doing what i love. and right now, i ahve a certain idea, but this is the year that will determine if i get to do what i want.

As three days grace sings, "Now and again we try/To just stay alive/Maybe we'll turn it around/'Cause it's not too late/It's never too late".

Cause our hearts are locked forever~

2008-03-04T00:56:00.000-08:00

i got my Simple Plan CD. YEYYYY. I thought, like, whats the difference if i buy it later or now.. i'll still be spending my money! Right now, my favourite song would be Save You, written for Pierre's brother. But the title of my blog entry today is from "Take My Hand", I cant critic the album yet cos ive not heard it properly yet cos my taking care of my youngest brother too so... Maybe later okay??

Anyhoooo, i failed my math test. SIGHHHH. Let's just say, i hope March Block Test will at least get me and E?? Pretty please. We passed Mr Yip the tarts and cupcake today! HAHAHAHA. He was so sweet and wanted to share it wqith us, but its not enough larhhhhh!

Anyway, our future GP teacher, Mr Paul Chau(??) is really cool too. He is soooo funny! Im glad he is our teacher. Lets hope he can handle the class.

Well, ciowxedd! Gotta study and all. Histiry SEA test tmr. Did i mention i love Burma's history and SARIT! LOL.

To Replace "hate" with "fate".

2008-03-02T01:01:00.000-08:00

That is taken from my brother's new song. i have no idea the title. HAHA. Well, he has written his new songs, and i think its actually really good. It had the "read between the lines" message. He has talent, i hope he gets to record it and then, publicise it on his Myspace cos i think, he has done a pretty good job so far. All the best to him!

Anyway, a new maid has arrived on Friday. Talk about efficiency in those agencies. Her name is siti, and she looks super young. SIGHHH. Shes alright i guess, lets see how it goes as weeks pass. Mum is getting a little stressed out about having to do most things to guide her and all, and with Qimi crying all over, its gets pretty frustrating for her. I hope this gets better soon.

Yesterday, i barely did anything you can call revision! I jsut had absolutely NO MOOD to study. I cant believe it, but GP block test, is this week. SIGHHH. Then its one week of break before all the other tests. I cannot believe, 10 weeks of school have passed by sooo fast! I still remember Mrs Koh counting down the weeks for us "Week 5 already ahh.. 5 more weeks till your block tests!" And i was thinking, well, thats a lot of time, but now that has shrunk to 2 weeks, and im scared to my bones. Better get chopping today, and i have the lond due DOM essay still. That will surely kill me but im gonna get it done before i watch the Bolton match. =D

Whispers: YESSSS.. FOOTBOOOL!

I miss blogging. SIGHHHH. Hmm.. What else happened? I ran 8 rounds at a horrible timing. HEHEEH. Shall imprve but there is seriously no way im going to complete it top 50 in the road race man. Thats like mathematically impossible! =X

Well, im going to get down to DOM after reading some blogsss.. I'll write nest week. Oh, and please pray for me that i'll get by week 10. Seriously, good riddance, February!

sometimes not saying anything is easier

2008-02-28T00:45:00.000-08:00

today, at 5am, my maid went home. I didnt say godbye, i didnt give her a hug. And the last thing i said to her was, dont forget, 5am okay. And then, came the rush of calls, and her anxiousness and delight of going home after staying with what felt like 5 years but actually was 8 years, with us.

I woke up to the calls of my Pri 4 brother who was calling for her. And i felt angry, not at him, at myself. For not saying a proper goodbye and giving her the respect she was due. But it was so hard, and i wanted to cry that morning. Imagine the feeling, the first thing in the morning. I just wanted to bury myself under the pillows, and give her a frantic call to say goodbye. Really, but it felt so hard, because to be truthful to you and myself, i didnt want her to go home. I wanted her to stay cos her presence made home feel normal somehow. Like she was always there. And it felt easier not to say anything cos then, maybe you wont have to confront your emotions, but as i type this out in the library in Innova JC, my eyes are tearing. And I just wish her all the best for her future endeavors, and that she would hve reached Inodonesia safely. I also want to thank her for all the things she did for me... being my listening ear, taking care of us and being a friend. I will truly miss having her aorund the house. I never thought i'd feel this way, but i do, and im not surprised.

Well, there goes the announcement. The library is closing in 10. I still have a lecture later. Goodness. Thursdays are jsut horrid. Well, the true test of home, will start today. Actually it started at 6.30am today.

Take a Star from the sky

2008-02-23T05:44:00.000-08:00

You'll never go to heaven
Or even to L.A.
If you don't believe there's a way

i feel like plucking every star that passed me by this week.

Unfortunately, none has. Okay, maybe a few by the name of nicole Tan, Studying hard, and trying to see BABE every morning. Other than that, my week has been close to a wreck.

Things with 0732A has been going from bad to worse. Im not trying to publicise it, but im jsut stating the cold hard facts. I jsut wished the class wasnt as factionalised anymore. At first, i thought, it was going to be okay being factionalised, but now, it seems we're waaayyyy to factionalised that we cant unite to correct the wrongs.

And its too late to correct the wrongs now cos steps have been taken to factionalise the class further. Seating arrangments, attitudes, its just seems like such a MAJOR problem when it was almost nothing 2 weeks ago. The awkwardness, the pretense, the division, its so frustrating. It seems that i despise his classes nowadays. It seems almost unbearable when he gets sarcastic and "threatens" us with our SGC. All of this treatment and attitude on both our parts seem ridiculous. And i want to walk out. But we see you everyday. It seems you no longer understand how it feels like being 17 or 18, when you forget, and when you screw up. Or even when you just dont care. And you have to step up to us, unfortunately, you chose to do otherwise. You chose to give up. And suddenly, all's not well. And i dont get why your attitude, cos youre the one whos suppose to show us an example of not giving up. Its rather low on your part. but i cant say we are innocent. Maybe, thats why im so mad about this hole situation. Cos i know im wrong too.

Sometimes, i feel like i dont deserve to be the CG rep, because i talk to much, and laugh too loud, and am too opiniated. But wrestling with all this different qualities of myself to be a better person. And i cant help but screw up. Maybe, you will see.

Im still sick. A little. I had my nose's phlegm the worse.

Pool are having a match tonight. Against Boro. I hate Boro matches, somehow, they always manage to conjure up something! I heard from palvin eduardo had a freak accident on pitch. Oh well, they will surely choke. I know it man. I can jsut see it coming. Although, i dont want Man U to win BPL 07/08 season, it is undeniable they could cos Arsenal always chokes. Okay, im being evil. my bad.

I seem to ot have anything else to say now.

Oh, i hanged out with nicole Tan, my star. Sigh. I studied, she studied (a little!) and we ate what some CNY goodies then.. we talked too of course. I love nic tan. I think thats one of our most honest sessions. I can be so honest with her and yet, she accepts me for me. My opinions, my hysterical laughter, myself. And its so great to be among people who truly appreciate your presence and your qualities and especially so if the feeling is mutual.

Well, Safa was my star too. My love the friendship we have created being the only malays in class. Now, due to our chattiness we are separated in class. GREAT. anyway, we took the bus and were the forst to reach AMKSS from our class. the bus ride was so funny... we kept talking and laughing. And there was this funny incident, and i bet everyone on the bus was jsut staring at us! so embarassing! HAHA. finally we cabb-ed to AMKSS cos we had no idea where it was and actually ended up at Marymount, bishan? LOL. Classic.

Community service was actually quite back-breaking. I borught study materials for my study session w nic tan. OMGOSSSHH. walking back and forth near Toa Payoh MRT is no joke. But i think i collected like.. at least 1/2 the can? So im proud of myself. Especially since, last year, i didnt do a good job. Hey, relief effort for future. Im glad to do my part! =D But it wasnt an easy task. But it started off right and ended off great too. I thoroughly enjoyed my day with the girls.

Now, all i have to do, is make time to sweeney todd. I can tell BABE is getting impatient... but so am i. Sigh, please help us work this out?

Hey, say your prayers for me this coming week. I really cant take a another disaster. PLUSSS... there are 2 tests!

Positive attitude.

I should be ashamed of this, I'm not,
'Cause I have tasted grapes.
This smile, don't look.
It's my BAIT, my WORDS, the HOOK
the audition/Approach the Bench

The harder you try to NOT screw up, the more you just do

2008-02-14T22:51:00.000-08:00

thats what Week 7 has been. FULL of screw-ups. Im just glad its friday. The week just started wrong. I can barely remember Monday. Thursaday, V day was suppose to be a good day, but turned out totally wrong. From the beginning. It only got better towards the end of the day. but Friday, sucked sooo mch still cos im jsut so worn. Mr Mahmood said he hates our class publicly. In front of our whole History lecture. I cant blame but seriously? Talking to him nowadays is jsut so awkward. Like you cant joke with him anymore.

Anyway, ive been feeling bummed out a lot. I just feel ive not been a good CG rep. I didnt bring the Thermometer, i wore pink flowery earring despite Mr mahmood's UNheard warning. And i forgot to bring Sheryl's form. OH GOSSSSHHH. Im getting amnesia i think.

Im just REALLY glad this week os over. Tmr theres the Lit course thing. OH GOD. its just a H1 for pete's sake. Im so over week 7.

Where are you, Nicole Tan?? HAHA. I miss you and your deadly weapon! PSSSSSSSSSTT the pus-sy thing at ---! HAHA. You should have felt the wind while Mel and PB and I walked to CWP. I just want to chill out now.

See you.

MORE PICTURESSS...!!

2008-02-08T08:20:00.000-08:00

Ive put my heart and soul into putting up London picss... so please, make it a point to have a look at the pics please!!! HAHA. they are really nice, we have magnificent photographers! I pormise you! LOL.

I miss England, and its simplicity. Being away from home, and school and studying.

Wont somebody take me there???

Ignore me if you see me cos i just dont give a S***

2008-02-07T19:49:00.000-08:00

Line taken from the City is at War by Cobra Starship

Dont you think Gabe Saporta is soooo good looking?? HAHA. hes my new eye-candy. I love his cheekbones. GOSHHH. The video for the song is also pretty cool. They actually used an analogy. So instead of using weapons to show "war" they used PIES. Yes, PIES. So, when you get smacked with a pie, youre dead. And theres a scene when thaey were making the pies, and you see Gabe sieving thorugh white stuff, and the first thing that came to my mind was cocaine or heroine. but then the camera shifted to a sack of sugar. So i think its another symbol. After all Drugs are maiking the world go down too right?

Listening to: Smile for the Papparazzi/ Cobra Starship.

This song is really cool, and can definately be a club song. =) If youre thinking where the heck the groovy mix might be influenced from... Gabe was born at Uruguay! How cool right? im thinking like, if you want your child to born in a more cooler place, you know not sembawang, or ang mo kio or something... you could always go some where else to give birth, but that a crazy place, but i think Dover is pretty cool! =P

Anyway, im lookin through my songlist, to put on blog, cos we the kings has been there for what seems like forever and wayyyyy overdued. Im tempted to chg my layout too. HEHHHH. we'll see came back again and see how things goes.

BTW, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO ALL MY FRIENDSSSSS! HAVE A GREAT ONE GUYSS!

TO MY DEARST BABE

2008-02-05T05:21:00.000-08:00

DEAR BABE,

That was so great of you dedicating a post to me. Youve officially made me miss you more. How come we dont hang out anymore?? And whatever happened to your BELATED BELATED birthday celebration? LOL.

I felt so bummed out after training, and i jsut wanted to call you but i figured you had tuition. We should talk more often cos we've not been doing that. Remember we'd have those long chats that revolved around school, our fears, our freinds and family and even jsut ourselves maybe even nothing but we always found something to harp about.

So many things have changed but im so glad we've stayed the same. I should thank thank God more often for bringing you to me or well, me to you. No idea where i would be if we stopped supporting each other. And lemme tell you, i hate our fights okay! I can seriously cry whenever you use the sarcastic tone on me or even get mad me! Im such a baby, please dont remind me! I can only hope that we can continue supporting each otehr through this journey ahead of us. That no matter how low life gets, i have you to fall back on and you know that you have me. You know i will do my best for you even though im the worse "go-to" person due to the immense screw-up factor in me. HAH. I might no be able to correct the wrongs, but i could give you advice, and i could be your listeing ear, and you can count on that.

BABE, remember our promise? If you find someone, and you think that someone can make you happy, or you really want to TRYYYYY... You can okay! After all, rules are meant to be broken, but this must be after a full analysis by us two alright. LOL.

Lastly, have a great journey, babe. Enjoy the rays of sun that you love, enjoy the car ride, enjoy the palm trees that pass you by but most importantly, enjoy the moment that you have. Cos once youre back here, its back to school work. So, just breathe little and have a good one. Im already missing you. Cant wait till monday to give you a hug.

LOVE YOUUU babe. ALWAYS.

Deal With the Pressure

2008-02-05T05:06:00.000-08:00

So says coach Jamie.

Im was so bummed out after training on Weds. I have a week to redeem my esteem and get back on my feet and show him that i can really "deal with the pressure" and i really can be part of A-Divs team, cos thats what i really want.

He asked how much effort we were all willing to put in, but i could only muster a 8.5 over 10. And he expected us to give 11 over 10. I couldnt pass him a fast ball, and im seriously disappointed with myself. While everyone else was gettig recognition, i was just screwing up time after time. This just sucks, and on top of the pressure he is putting on the team as a whole, i am putting pressure on myself to perform so i can improve as a player too. I really dont know what Im thinking with this mounting pressure. I jsut want to be part of the A-divs team, badly. You have no idea.

Schools been okay. Im been rattling about the break we're getting and im so pysched for it! I wanna study, relax, just study at my own pace and yet cover much. I feel ive been slowing down a little, and i really cant afford to do that.

GP comprehension was horrid! It wasso tough... oh gosh, i dont think i did my best! SIGH.

Tomorrow, we are going to wrap hampers for the old folks fr CNY. Im so happy. Tomorrow is going to be a good day of giving. And whats better than that right?

Hello, BREAK!

a different kind of me, this time

2008-02-01T07:22:00.000-08:00

title taken from Paul Twohill's/Here I Am

helloh!

Im all positive and happy cos this week has been jsut filled with blessingsss! Alhamdullilah! The beginning of the week wasnt great thanks to the heavy workload i didnt even touch thanks to math test! So, monday and tuesday were jsut filled with completing the jungle of homework.

And my hard work for the weekend, paid off cos i got 18/25 for my test! WEEEEE. Its a start, isnt it? i hope i can bring back more great news and jsut slowly but surely plant the seeds to my success, for, GOALS WITHOUT EFFORT, ARE NOTHING BUT A WISH =)

also, im thnakful for the manymany friends that jsut always bring out the funny side of me, and help me try to see the joy in life, despite some difficult circumstance! The boys (im speaking generally cos, hell, im biased!) have been absolutely a pain in the ***. RUDE, NEGATIVE, IRRESPONSIBLE, and too top off all that, COWARDLY and plain NASTY. so, instead of always bad-mouthing them next week and calling Boris thio a moron most times when he says something dumb, correction, always says something dumb, i shall just ignore their absurdity and ignorance, cos they are the ones who will suffer int he end. I better watch my step cos i do not want Karma to bite me in the ***.

Anyway, we also had Econs test, which was today. 3 pages but i dont think i evaluated the policies too well! i kept saying equitability and efficiecy, but failed to explain HOWWW??? So, im doomed.

Did i mention, im with palvin singh for history SEA assignment? What (good) luck i didnt have TH and Boris. PHEW! I lovee palvin singh. He hates ppl getting mad at him so he tries to come to a compromise, which is anything but enough, but at least he tries right? And the fact that hes sooo funny and that just wins me over! Im glad i have palvin in my group. But dont tell him that!

And to top off the week... Floorball training. Im more determined to just continue improving! i want to be in A-divs team! Really, i can score, i jsut need more control and i need to just be better at defending! I love being a defending when you have to get up close to the opponent and jsut block his way. I love that, brings the competitive spirit in myself. Today, is cored twice. =) but i think rochester's team totally kept us out of our winning streak! =( HAHA Valhall was niceee.. now, that place isnt much a stranger anymore.

And thank you ahmad for helping me with the directions for my dad. god bless you, and may you enjoy your back-packing days with your brother dude. Take care of yourself okay... and just have fun. =D

Valentine's day is coming. dont you feel the love in the air?? Okay, not really, cos there are couples breaking up. But the love between Babe and I, my class friends, whom i can now call my great joker friends, between my friends, are in full blossom, and i have loads to be thankful for.

My life seems to be settling down now, like everything is just falling into place. I feel the pain of school load, but i still find myself, laughing and smiling and sleping in class and yet, ifeel happy. And something, when im with my friends, im so afraid that things will change too fast. and i jsut want to cherish all the lunch hour we share, and all the jokes we jsut cant take from each other. Im so afraid to blink cos im afraid the moment will be lost forever. Do you get what im trying to say?

Of course i know i cant be laughing all the time and im sure, one time or another, life will get me down. but i cant let it keep me there. Because life is about moving forward too. And sometimes, the pain lingers, and you think that you cant overcome it, but i think, you just learn to live with that pain. Put that brave face on, an just march on. Thats what soldiers do right? Kill till they get numb. Maybe, thats what we do by moving on. somehow this paragraph is making me sad. Im so afraid of running out or being stuck.

Anyway, i asked for an ipod from my mum. Suddenly, i want an Ipod. Everybody has that gadget but ME! How deprived. =( She says when she has the moolah. ERRRR... that means, wait longlong. I dont normally ask for things, i only do when i get desperate, so i guess im desperate for an ipod. I refuse to pay it with my own money! I wanna get Keds shoes with MY money! HURH.

nolove/simpleplan
broken down like a mirror smashed to pieces
you learn the hard way to shut your mouth and smile
if these walls coudld talk, they'd
have so much to say
cos everytime you fight
the scars they are going to heal
but they're never gonna to go away

I wish i could save you

2008-01-26T02:53:00.000-08:00

I just finished reading Pierre's blog on Myspace and im just awed by him. "Save you" is song from their album and its about his brother who went through cancer not once, but twice. It got so bad he had to be quarantined and people could only visit him with latex gloves and masks and all that protection. And his condition got so bad he got infections jsut from breathing so he had ulsers in his mouth and couldnt eat. Im jsut in awe how someone can carry on and how someone finds SO much strength in such dark hours. Especially, alone and when you know, what others can do, is limited and the effect can only be seen months later. How do you live waiting for positive change? And all along, Pierre was going through this but he still managed to keep his emotions in and get on with life as a musician. Life stories, the more you get them, the more you can learn. And believe me, you'll be a better person. Life stories.

The day was okayy. Woke up early to do math and continued in the afternoon. My eyes really hurt from doing math so i decided to take a break. Watched teevee and went online. Yesterday, i awoke thanks to nicoles sms at 2 in the morning. That girl is crazy. LOL. And i began thinking like "shoot. This girl was doing math till 2? and im sleeping?" I think im being paranoid and i think im beginning to feel the competition heating up even though its just January. and now, i really wnat to do well, and be on par with my other cousins. Cos they are jsut brilliant. So the pressures on me, and right now, its working to my advantage cos its pusing me but i know control. I really dont wanna burn out too soon, even better, at all. Being the emotional wreck that i am, ive got to watch my step.

I see Februsry peeking around the corner, and week 5. that means, 5 more weeks till block tests! EEEEKKKKKZZZZ. SIGHHH.

My mum and dad are having a bicker and she took off for work w/o dad. SIGHHH. I hope this ends soon. Tension = lack of concentration

Anyway, ive got to find other ways to entertain myself. for y'all interested in the Arts, go check out the Greek special all the way for Louvre at the National musuem. Should be pretty cool. Ends on march 16! =D Im going... i think! LOL.

So what have I got to prove
And what have I got to lose
When youre not worth fighting for
And why am I feeling down
While youre out messing around and youre
Not worth begging for

Its up to me
Its up to me
And I'm still falling
Its up to me
Its up to me
And I'm still calling

9 in the Afternoon

2008-01-25T01:03:00.000-08:00

Line taken from Panic At the Disco first upcoming single!

Anyway, school was okay today. =) But it got really draggy cos we had PE and 3 straight tutorials which really is unbearable. Surprisingly, History was pretty funn in a sense, i didnt have to pay attention too much cos was catching up with XT and dear Sheryl. And of course i had seventeen mag to entertainment me! =X My gosh, i still remember reading that mag at 16 and thinking " Seventeen? im not even there yet. so old!"

And now,im eighteen.
Can hardly believe it.

Talking about age, taking 900A brings back sweet memories nowadays. jsut today, i saw this boy from PAP kissing his older sister from innova primary on the left, right and on the lips. And i thought he was sooooo sweet. then the boy went to his mum and took this blue water bottle and passed it to her sister then the mum came up to the girl and kissed the same way: Left, right and on the lips. You jsut know that the family is tight knit and the parents taught them well.

And it remind me so much of how i kiss my grandma. And im so glad her eye surgery went great and i couldnt thank god enough for the health He has given and is still giving to my Grandma for she is the world to me.

Anyway, ive been ctaching some SP clips before their album release. And it was good. I think the albums only going to be out like late feb or early march? Which is sad cos everyone in europe and US will already be rocking to their album waaaaayyy before i do. HURRRRR... oh, and that means, i need to save. =(

Ive quite an appetite so says Safarina. Ive been eating during break, during lunch or on short days, after school then, maybe OCK on the way home or twister fries or Bubble tea and then i have secret recipe cake at home and i eat dinner at home. OH GOSSSSHHHH. Im jsut throwing you my unhealthy diet, how unfortunate for you.

Anyway, i need tips on how to spread loser syndrome. I need more ppl to be infected with it. Right now, only Nicole Tan is. Im thinking Melissa or nicole Tay next! HAHAHAHA. SHUSSSSHH... between you and me only horrr.

Mun Ling and i finally got a locker. 302. HEHEE. but right now its empty and ive vowed to myself to take all the lecture booklets that i may have left there on Friday back home so there is no excuse to not study for the weekend. HEHE. theres only my Adidas deodarant and some of Babe's stuff innit.

Speaking of Babe, we had a fight this week. And we've had poor communication since then. i will never ever get anyone to get my food ever again. unless its during break like a cup or a bottle, but definately not like what happened. I was so confused over what happened, and suddenly, it felt like Babe was my mum. So, as usual as when its with my mum, i jsut shut up and wait for answers. I wouldnt take forgranted anyone, and from now onwards no more food errands.

Training with coach on Weds was fun too. But i need help with shooting. and dribbling too.

O-levels out. And from what i heard form taufiq, his badge did better than my badge by 1%. But apparently some ppl didnt make it. =( SIGGHHHH. On a happpier note, Syikin, got 7 points! And is heading to Victoria, Insyaallah! Whole family is proud of her. Cant wait to talk to her and catch up. I can only say "Keep striving for more, Syikin!" =D I need to see that NPCC guy. I hope he made it.

Meanwhile, stuff at home are jsut going downhill. I came home to my mum getting frustrated at STARHUB CABLE TEEVEE bcos her HBO package is missing. And the whole confusion about my bro's phone being weak thus he couldnt pick up and all. OMGGGG. Now they are all off for his parent meeting session, im expecting more noise later... BUT, pray for me there wont be too much okay. I jsut want to enjoy today, then study tonight cos Friday shows are the worst. The irony.

Im at SP's Myspace. I miss them and their music. Im listening to their song "the end". and i really like it.

And No matter where im heading
And no matter what i do
something keeps me coming back to you
I see you next to me but still you feel so far away
Where did we go wrong? (X2)
I guess its just the part of what you look at me and say
Good bye
Dont
Dont let me go
Its not the end.

Quicksand

2008-01-24T06:50:00.000-08:00

My day strated off well, but the night was just horrible.

Ive no idea why but i keep squabbling with my younger brother nowdays. Hes such a bugger. OMGOSHHH. And the house is just no place to study. Then i could at least do 1 hour of econ revision and some math before i sleep but now, i ahve to wait till 10.30 for me to really start working. Its so irritating. To make up for lost time, im wkaing up at 5 to study. I feel so nocturnal.

Tonight, i jsut feel absolutely, no motivation whatsoever. Im quuite a complex person it seems. My dad always asks me questions like "how was your day?" "Are you coping?" OR the one i hate most "What are you doing?" I find them trivial and rhetorical. And sometimes i answer rudely with a one word reply and maybe "I dont want to tak about it", and the next day he will ask "Why were you in a bad mood yesterday?" In which i reply "NOOOOO...". I dont get it. I jsut dont feel he encourages me more then he pressures me or checks on me. And its really making me feel really lowwww.

I just dread going home nowadays. I jsut prefer staying in school and study. Maybe i should that more often. Home is just now condusive anymore. And all the responsibilities of getting their checkng on their spelling and helping them, i jsut cant help but ask myself "WHAT ABOUT MEEEE?" I just feel so stretched.

Thank god its friday tmr. I feel my mind is about to explode with too much emotions, and i want to cry so much but im just trying to be really strong here. I jsut hope everything with the family turns out okay, The whole "no teevee during weekdays" is a little too much its rubbish, in fact. I HATE IT.

Everything's, Everything's Magic

2008-01-20T04:01:00.000-08:00

Ive always been so sure im such a huge pop punk rock fan. since i loved bands that many mainstream people dont. Especially my friends. I was listening to Paramore even before Riot was out. So, its strange for people to tell me like "GOSH. PARAMORE ROCKXXX". Ive not right to call these people posers, but errmmm.. dont they sound like posers? HAHAH. Oh, whatevs. Protecting the beginnings of many bands i guess. From the unknown to all the groupie lovers. SIGHHH.

But anyway, thats not the point.

I didnt quite realise but Mun Ling kinda made me think. And when i checked my song list, i noticed. All the new songs i d/l, they are all soft, with mostly lady voices and are soulful. OH.. SCAAA-REEE. Im listening to A Fine Frenzy, Ingrid Michaelson, and yesterday, i was listening to material from Moses Mayfield and Graham Colton. Really nice sleeping to these songs.

Want my must-have music list?
1) A Fine Frenzy - Near to you
2) One Republic - Stop and Stare
3) Graham Colton - All the world Tonight
4) Ingrid Michaelson - Corner of your Heart
5) Avril Lavigne - Tomorrow

Maybe, its part of growing up. Where i learn to appreciate the other side of being more calm and less angry. Hey, just like tom sang in Everything's Magic.

If i get to upload this song successfully, it should be up. Its call "Better With You" by Five Times August. When you click play... i need you to do these steps.

1) Imagine a bonfire. A circle with all your good friends. And you guys are jsut about settling down around the fire. And youre joking about, some of y'all playing silly/ stupid games lile Truth or Dare (HAHA) and then...
2) Someone, one of the guys, took out his acoustic guitar. And starts strumming to this song. Singing and you guys...
3) start singing too. Swaying left to right. nodding you heads and snapping your fingers, clapping.
4) You take a moment, and look around the circle and you see your friends

All you want, is for this night to last forever. more music, more laughter more chasing around the fire. I think our badge should have a bonfire. Okay, maybe at least a BBQ. Or even a similar thing in nicole's porch! =D Dont you love his voice?

Its schooling tmr. Ive been utterly and disgustingly UNproductive this weekend. Limited amount of work done. Looks like a long night! =X Theres training too. Im not sure about going cos Coach is not going to be there! =( Hes coming Wednesday. SIGHHH. Tmr is heavy-bag day. OHOHOH... AND I WANNA GET A SHARED LOCKER WITH BABE TOOOOO! Woohoooo!

I don't know how I'll feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day

And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Yeah I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...

Tomorrow it may change

PS: SORRY! CANT D/L Better With You. So, this is my best try to getting for you the song. Its still very nice. Dont think about the guy. HEHEH.

This is Our Time

2008-01-19T05:10:00.000-08:00

Hola!

Guess what! Im getting the jitters already! Theres the premiere of Season 5 of OTH! Thanks to my messenger, Syaza! =D Blogs are a great way of communicating! But i just youtube-edd it but just got to view a little of the first eppy. SOOOO full of surprises! =X Actually the title of my entry is from a line on their promo vid.

Our time is now. And what we've lost, we cant claim. But we have, we can cherish. And this sorta remind me of the song from One Republic that ive been enjoying so much cos every word ozzes with meaning. So lovely.

You have to enjoy it for yourself okay, so log on to youtube and check it out.

I thought i had lots to say but i guess i dont. Gosh, this is so random. Im sorry if i sound so anti climax. HURH.

The long awaited weekend!

2008-01-11T05:11:00.000-08:00

hello!

Been MIA for a bit. Excuse me, what can i say? A-level student you know! HEHEH. Kidding larhhh....

Anyway, ive managed to do a little revision everyday so i know about the next day's lecture better and that has definately help me improve in my concept. Miss Wang's quizes for each tutorial also keeps me on my toes and her teaching and encouragement makes me really grateful to have her. I like Mr Lim, but he is just unable to control my class! We're a handful!

Something not so good is that history lessons and lectures have been a drag. Fundamentalism, Fundamentalism, Fundamentalism. SERIOUSLY. Like what the hell? I really think this topic about religious conflicts is so boring! Its almost the same thing for the other 2 categories. SIGHH. Oh, ive also been picked on for talking. *points to Palvin* Hes damn distracting, but since lessons have been boring... Im thankful i had him. We played tick tack toe, talk a little and shook our heads tgt at how aimless the lect was. Sighh, i love history. Please make it more interesting next week!

Gippy has been good. I like Mr Yip's style, where he gets us on the board to write factors. And i mean the WHOLE class! I think its very good to know he tries to make it not so dull. Did i mention that he has been incridibly patient too! I like Mr Yip! =D

Lit with Mdm Chitra has also been great. The fact that we can just give our perspective on the poem, is really beneficial. "Try me." thats what she says. And she wont laugh at your idea, she improves on it or helps us work on it. So its just great encouragement. I think lit tutorials are gonna be great fun. Oh, but shes VERY strict! Like no yawning. notebooks, files. EVERYTHING must be there or else... DOOMED!

My math has been.. hmm.. Mr Pang is nice. But sometimes, the class just takes advantage of him. For example, by talking, or not doing our work. And thats what i dont like. I mean, hes already trying so hard, teaching a slow class isnt an easy-peasy task, so i get pretty ticked off when palvin or boris goes chatting like their conversations are more important. But, so far, he hasnt had to raise his voice so, i think we're still not going over the thin red line. Math is okay, i just need LOTSSSSSS of practice. i cannot stress on that word enough! =(

PE has been manageable too. but i really hate the idea of them draining us then making us rain. I really canno run in to my best potential that way! =( Im so damn slow larh. 5 rounds and my timing is 14min 30+ sec. Im determined to imporve i need to if i want to be able to sustain my energy during Floorball.

Coming to that! I LOVE FLOORBALL TRAININGS nowadays. with the J1s coming in, its just great to be kind of giving back to the next badge of Floorball-errzzz in Innova. And my 2 legs are hurtiong at different areas so its tough for me, but i really dont want to miss trainings! The matches we play, ive never wanted to try it so bad. especially since Rochester and (today) Hakim joined in the fun. Seeing these two guys play is like seeing the physical turned into art. OHOHOH, did i miss the most important point of this whole paragraph?? I scored a goal against Starsky!!! WOOOOOHHHOOOOO! Okay, i have to respect Starsky okay! hes damn talented, so beating him to the goal was jsut the icing to my training. Now, i cant wait for Monday's late training cos Coach Jaime is coming! Say "FLOORBALL". Ive never loved sweating this much. Oh my my. I really want to play in A-divs this year.

I can only do my best to continue coping with my academics and improving my fitness level so i can be a better Floorball player.

Floorball is heart.

My mum and dad has returned from Msia. And i need to study too. At least a little cos i have studied in school while waiting for training.

Oh, i was chatting with Vanitha from my UK trip. GOD, i miss her! i miss laughing with her and seeing her blush at her mistakes and jsut omygosshhh, walking in the freezing cold with her. Now, we only get to say few words in school. how i wish we could just talk and look over England pics and be in the coach or the Cambridge hostel sleeping in the same room and laughing with my Mrs Left? I just miss Vanitha a lot. Its not the same anymore... but, i will forever cherish the moments we shared in England. Hey girl, we'll stick to each others like bees. I love your poem. REALLY.

Ciowzed! YEY for long entries!

Youre the Catalyst

2008-01-08T05:19:00.000-08:00

Oh how i miss writing here!

Its wednesday and i am just done doing my reserch on fundamentalism, extremism, terrorism. Indeed, i have to say, this is a very sensitive subject. And while i was going through some websites, i saw some online debates and one particularly caught my eye. This girl was asking why do people (the general public) hate Muslims so much? Aftre all, we are innocent, and we werent the perpertrators behind the 9/11 attacks. And that discussion had many replies. And it was nice to see how some ppl truly tried not to judge Islam and Muslims. Others, were aksing more Muslims to speak out cos no voice was heard going agaisnt Osama and actions, and they question our support of anti-terrorism. I guess that is true. Why wasnt there anyone outwardly sayng that hey, What the Al-Qaeda did was wrong? I knew deep in my heart that it was wrong. There were voices, but maybe, we werent loud enough. Maybe if we were, we could encoureage these perpertrators? Im not confident, but i have hope, and thats a start right? and maybe, just like the crusade, one day what they call now the War on Terrorism will end.

Ive licked my wounds and carried on

2008-01-04T02:09:00.000-08:00

The first week of school has been manageable. But waking up on a Friday morning jsut the third day of school was pure torture. I already felt so tired from the week. I wonder how 5 days of school would feel like =( Im too afraid to even think about it! SIGHHH. But it was nice to see everyone back. All the Lit babiess and my class 0732A. I think i truly miss having Fahmie, Kenneth and Kannan in the class. Teachers kept saying that "this is a very quiet arts class". NO LABELLING PLEASE. Sighhh.. its always soooo nice to talk to kannan. HEHEH... Vani, your secret's safe with me! =D

Anyway, i was looking for some pics, and went to my desktop and was looking through my folder when i saw all the Racial Harmony Day 06 pictures. Oh how i miss those days. Makes me miss all my good friends in WRS. Ahmad, Amy, nures, Jian sheng, Teng loong... and the canteen. And i saw pics with my good guy friends Khairul, Hakim Putra, Dominic Farhan... i still remeber 2e1 days! HAHAH. OH DEAR! so cheesy! Okay! STOP. going too far back alr! HAHA.

I saw Khairul in the library yesterday. I refuse to think and talk about it cos it was weird awkward and not to mention rediculously funny! Classic Khairul encounter. Shall remember it man. Whenever i tell it to any of my friends, they never fail to laugh.. i can be such an ass. Mun Ling says she's gonna warn my out-of-control-ness habit to my future boyfriend. Now, i'll never get one!

Well, i just wanted to let you know im fine. I ran 4 rounds today and it seems my stamina is still pretty good. And apparently, i got shorter! 157 and i lost some weight too. not much tho. I should stop complaining about my weight cos i just read articles about how some billions of ppl in the world facing malnutrtion and here i am, fully nourished and im complaining. Goodness! They'd be happy to weigh 46kg! So should I.

"Take the pain out of love, and then love wont exists"
A line from The Academy Is/Everything we Had.

Is it true then? That with love comes pain?
Is it? Why does it always have to hurt then?
And when it hurts, its love?

Or does it just mean, its time to break it off?

I really dont believe it has to be this way, but what do i know?

Oh, hear the skeptic speak!

Happy New Year!

2008-01-01T05:36:00.000-08:00

helloh.

Happy new year! Truly 2008 has ben started on a right note. =) I woke up to the calling of my mother's voice sayingg "Everybody wake up!" GOSHHH. i was super tired! but i did anyway, and she had made this really nice western breakfast! Bake beans, croissants, egg, sardine! LOVELY.

Then, an hour later, we got ready to head to East Point with Pak Busu's family to go for buffet. Damn costly! We spent close to 300 bucks. So my dad was saying that we started the year off with a BANG! LOL. The food was good, it was like seoul garden, just more variety. definately more expensive that seoul garden! But my mum was like "nvm.. once a year only." HEHHH.

Anyway, after that we all went swimming at Woodlands. Ive tanned lines! =( I wonder how you get them when you were mostly underwater? Okay, not a science student here, so i really dont get it. LOL.

Well, i loved the day. I mean, it has helped in giving me a positive attitude to start 08. So, im looking forward to tmr where i can see all my classmates again. And feel the whole "comfort" of routine. God please be with us! =D

Immeeting ML at 7.15am tmr at Vista. YELPSSS... the thought of waiting for 900A bores me alr... oh! POSITIVE ATTITUDE Syuhrah.

I'll be on my way now... TO BED!

Where for art thou Holidays?

Double standards??

2007-12-28T01:59:00.000-08:00

School was good. The literature drama workshop was fun.. im really thankful they didnt make it so boring cos i mean, it is the holidays, so yesterday was spent mainly on going through the different scenes. And ML and I were came in like 9.30? We had grab and go Macs breakfast! HAHA. But our instructor Stanley was really nice and he totally let us off - and its not the last time! HAHA =P

Since we were late, the two of us plus Angie and Nasri had to do role playing. i was a policewoman and ML was thief! HEHEHE. It was "fun" in a kiddish way.

Today, we ate at Kopi alley. EHHH.. quite cool eh the place but the person serving us must be having a bad morning man! HAH. Anyway, we reached school like 9.09. A BIG IMPROVEMENT! we had to put on a drama on he book Duchess of Malfi. i ended up playing Bosola. oh gosh.. with the white hair and bending and evil thing going onnn... LOL. LYDIA... PICS!! it was so funnn... and we made new friends too, though i dont quite know their names! =X

Anywya, after that, ML and I went to CWP to chill. We bought I am Legend tickets (yes, im watching it again) and went to Mac to share a Mcnugget meal. =D And so.. afters we were off to the movies.

Guess what.. My rbother got the electric guitar he justttt asked my mum for. HRURHHHH. dont even ask me what i think.. i jsut feel like a selfish bitch tho i have no right to feel that way!

PS: i want The Used DVD, any kind souls???? PLEASE!

We are his legacy.
He is Legend.
Light up the darkness.

lack of updates

2007-12-23T07:48:00.000-08:00

im sorry for the lack of updates.

I seem to be getting more more frustrated at the thought of school beginning

not to mention this UNbearable pimple on my noce like smacked right in the middle. OH THE HORROR. im turly living a girl's worse nightmare. i refuse to get out of the house! =((((( And my mum is suppose to birng us shopping for school supplies tmr and tues! OMGOSSSSHHHHH. What a disaster.

ANYHOWWWWWW... my cousins jsut spent a day sleeping over and i miss them and my grandma alr. they left this afternn thanks to tuition! =X Anyway, my cousins are all growing up!! =( OHHHH. Well, the girl Airin whos entering pri 4 says no more dolss after thiss year and this year, she even opted for a NO disney character bag? oh how fast your childhood endsss.. well, i guess we all still have our inner kidd. Well, i do! HAHAH. *whispers: Not surprisingly!*

I tried doing some math today, lets just say, i have to try agian tmr. YIKES.

Im so bored, and its 11.56pm. i jsut watched Xmen 2 of Star movies. I love the X-Men trilogy. i practically go GAGA over it!

SIGHHHH. i hope i dont get over paranoid about school. I mean, ive been thorugh it for over 10 years, and im doing fiine, not going retarded... YET. mmm.... time to ponder. LOL.

This is Who We Are

2007-12-21T01:58:00.000-08:00

i know this is a little too late, and youre long gone, but remembering shouldnt have to end right?

The guitarist to Hawthorne Heights passed away, weeks ago. I couldnt really think of a proper song to dedicate to him but i know now.

This is Who We Are by his very own band.

I miss Hawthorne Heights, i hope their whole mess with the record label clears up so they can put up an album and we can all hear new material once again.

May you rest in peace, Calvert.

My Fears are Reality

2007-12-19T21:04:00.000-08:00

Im kinda bummed out now.

Listening to: Heartbreaker/Will.I.Am
Oh how i love this song.

Well, i did the brainstorm of one of my 2 essays, screwed to get 5 points to make 1500 words even possible. I still have one more essay then, i need to type it out in proper sentences and send it to Mr Mahmood by tomorrow. Screwed can?! =(

Today is Hari Raya Haji. And yesterday, we had a kekah for my youngest brother Qim at Wak Tanjong Mosque. It was a very -- experience. I dont know how to fill that blank. Well, we got back at 11.30pm and i stayed up till 2am watching teevee and then woke up at 3.50 to watch the POOL game.

WE FREAKIN LOST. i refuse to say anything. its shameful, rediculous.

Well, the morning was lovely. it was raining, i was so tired, i missed prayer. i feel so bad! =( I never missed aidiladha prayer since i started doing it man. It was a like a family thing.

My mum is busy cooking at the kitchen, im hopeless when it comes to kitchen work, so she obviously doesnt need my help there. LOL.

I should get strated on history right? i know. I jsut feel too lazy to strat what with the weather and all. Seriously, man.

Walking thorugh the Singapore Immigration, i knew all these school work is just gonna tumble on me till my back is agianst the work, now, i jsut have to work through it. I guess im scared. But so is everyone right? we have slightly more than a week before school starts. Somehow, i just want it to come so i can jsut adapt to it asap. this whole, waiting for something to happen, it just makes me more restless. 2007 is coming to a end. I have no regrets, as cliche as that sounds. 2008 cant be that bad, now can it? New goals, new bag, new lecture booklets, some new teachers?? A brand new start.

Suddenly, all i want is to be in a corner and think to myself.

im ready, im ready, im ready, im NOT ready.

Wont you walk through this with me?

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

The Grass is NOT always Greener on the Other Side

2007-12-17T23:52:00.000-08:00

Well, if you still dont know, im back from england =)

If you can infer, then you'll know that i did miss my sunny island Singapore. Well, mostly its the food. THEY FREAKIN DO NOT HAVE CHILLI SAUCE THERE!!! How is that even possible??? they are definately deprived! =( thank goodness some of my fellow trip-ersss, brought chilli sauce, that includes, Zul (Casanova), Vanitha (Mrs Left) and Sue ( =) smile bugger). LOL. So i wasnt totally deprived of all things good and spicy BUT! i totally miss chicken and beef! =( We actually missed an opporunity of eating kebabs at Bath. Having my first bite of chicken on my return flight, was absolutely heavenly! =D All the malays were just like, "I cannot wait to eat Chicken" whilst we were on the last day. HAHAHA.

But england wasnt all that bad.. Let me get into details.

The country once, one of the leading powers in the world, do not seem to have such a stature anymore. Sadly, many of their citizens, seem to not have pride in their country of them. Especially with the EU's pressure to make England just like many other European countries. Fortunately, England is still able to keep some sense of its individuality. For example using Sterling pounds instead of Euros.

But nevertheless, this country gave me an insight to the other side of the world. The different buildings structure, the inspiration poets and dramatists had, their culture, their way of life.

I shall not go into details of how each city was like, but in summary, the people there are indeed very freindly. For example, its a wonder, how our guides could withstand the cold, and yet have a smile upon their face and tell us stories of the places. And oh, how they dress! Particularly in London. They are so use to the cold they can wear tights and minis and maybe a layer of shirt then a jacket (UNBUTTONED!) while we had 3-4 layers to wear and still were feeling the cold! YELPS! LOL.

About the buildings, they are different from Singapore (DUH). Well, back then, they had thatch roofs, like straw room, and these were good cos it kept the warmth in and the roofs were steep because it had to quickly run off the water so it wont sep into the house. However, after the great fire in London, thatch roofs were BANNED. so thats why they have tiled roofs now. But, like Shakespeare's Globe theatre, some buildings were able to keep their thatched roofs.

Speaking about the Globe theatre, its is great i tell you. Can you jsut imagine, once, shakespeare would come and conduct his plays here. Its amazing.

Of course, when i talk about inspiration, i meant, the places the poets grew up in. For Shakespeare, in Stratford. Stratford was nice, and we had a hotel there too, which is a good change! =) Anyhow, all the coach rides,, instead of studying, like what i had planned, i was either sleeping or looking out at the scenaries outside. Their green pastures stretched out just like the sea when youre in the shore. You just cant see the end. And there were sheeps, cows lovely, love meadows. Picture perfect scenes! Sometimes, when it was dark (after 4.30), and i would look up at the sky, i would wonder, if MumDad were looking up at the very same skies. Of course, technically its impossible cos, my MumDad would be asleep cos it would be 0030h in the morning in Singapore! HAH! you can tell i missed my family, but i wasnt really homesick, after all, i do lovee ENGLAND!

Their culture... hmmm.. they put their trays away after eating at the fast food restaurants, they expect their tables to be clean when they want to be seated on it, so the previous user must also ensure that the tables are cleaned. Also, they stand on the right of the elvators while the left is for the poeple who are walking up the elevator. there were a few times i forgot, and PeiBao will be like "err.. syuhrah, you have to stand on the right." MY BADDDD! HAHA.

So, now about the people who i learnt to call my friends. Most of us were pretty new to Europe. So, we were all excited. I met new freinds both J1 and J2. I absolutely admire Cassandra, the then house captain of Sagitarius. Shes always so positive and animated. And she gave tips on how to do revision and the various way she revised. Im so thankful. Then form the J1s, i made freinds, with 2 Afiqah, Wen Jia, Joey, Charles, Kevin, Vanitha, Rekha. OHHHHHH, hostel life rockss man! We'd all be crashing each other rooms. Usually for me, i'd crash Sue's and Esther's room. And, smetimes, PeiBao's room when we got separated. And sometimes, Vani's and Rekha's room and of course the 2 Afiqahs. SOOOO MUCCCCHHHH FUNNNN CANNNNN! =D We'd be eating spicy instant noodles and maybe watchteevee at the lounge rooms, soemtimes, trying to create poems (which were our "homwork") or playing taiti and BLUFF! I learnt to play Taiti with Khairul's help! YEY. And i got to talk to Amin a little too on our flight back. Hmm... Some of them, above 18 were also drinking once the teachers left us be. =X It was a little scary cos, some of them would have red faces after drinking. Pedro seriously looked drunk one night. I was jst afraid of being puked on. Pedro is King of Taiti please! HAHA. He kicks ass all the time! Oh, they played Taiti so much, that they created Taiti Magistrate. LOL. And supposedly, Amin, Zul, Khairul and Charles, Cassandra and i think Pedro were part if it. And since, Esther came in later she had to "pay a sum of money to join!" HAHAH. Damn funny, and they even had an application form. HAHA, just kidding!

But, packing everything into your bag sure isnt easy and lugging it all over the place. And the more places you go, the more souvenirs you get, so, the more difficult it is to pack! HAHA. Not that i got a lot, thanks to how expensive the lfestyle is there. The cost of living there is 3 times it is living here! so, after a while, i just stopped multiplying everything by 3 course, if i did that, i wouldnt have bought ANYTHING. HAHA.

Well, you might be wondering why there are no pics, i brought, 2 memroy cards, and guess what? i lost one of them. Ive not told my dad, hes going to kill me. OMGOSSHHH. Like last night, was so nice and warm with the welcome i got from the family, then i realsied my memory card was missing! =( but i have the pics from Stratford onwards. So, i'll post them up soon.

Oh, the plane touched down, 10 minutes from 8. And by the time i got out to see my family waving at me... HAHA, it was 8.40pm. We got back home, my mum had ordered Pizza and before that, i was unpacking and giving out all the souvenirs. I think they were all pretty happy about it.

then, thanks to my fever, dad said it was form jet lag) i went to bed at 11.04 after popping Panadol, and slept for slightly over 12 hours cos i woke up 15 minutes to 12pm. The horror, but i counted it and realised it was 4 am England time, so maybe it was jsut my circadian rythm?

Well, i had a nice suprise when i woke up, cos my mum was cooking sambal prawn!!!!! oh, looooovvvvveeee. Did i say i missed England? HAHAH. I sms-ed dad and told him how i missed sambal prawn.. and voila, my mum cooked it for me! Oh, how nice. Unfortunately, my stomach was not not doing too good, still had no appetite, but i still ate, jsut not as much as i usually did. It was nice to wake up on my bed again.

Hey, its not always greener on the other side.

this was the poem i wrote on my second assigment. i have no title for it then, and i still dont now. So you can name it anything.

Orange form the street lamps
Red from the car headlights
Accompanied by the silence of the night,
and the never-ending streets.

Entering into the lives of
Shakespeare, the Brontes and the Romans
having an impact to this day
statues, memoirs, buildings, i saw.

For no country has astonished me this way
Every building has a story to tell
Every person has a light-hearted laughter
An opportunity, experiencing the life of
Shakespeare and the Brontes.

As i sit on this bulging luggage of mine
A piece of coal, postcards, gifts galore!
And the moment i step onto home
I'll be counting down the days
till im in England again.

Guess who's back??

2007-12-17T06:25:00.000-08:00

helloh!

Im back from England. Super tiredddd from all the flights. Totally energy-less and after this, im most probably going to sleep all this jet lag off and wake up and start on my long awaited history essays! =X

LOL.

Well, England was fun. And i learnt more than i expected to =) Bronte sister, shakespeare how all these poets and writers lived.

And of course we visited their ever prestigious universities, like Oxford and York and looked about Cambridge. It cost 20 000 pounds to study in Cambridge, a year. And you have 3-4 years. Look at how prestigios it is?

We managed to meet a fantasy writer from Oxford and Dr John roe who teaches in York and specialises in Shakespeare and Machiavelli. Cool name right?

I think im sick and running a fever. I should rest and continue tmr. SORRY.

Flying off

2007-12-02T20:44:00.000-08:00

i cannot believe im flying off tmr.
Im getting butterflies =(
Lets jsut hope everything falls into place tmr.

You know, jsut when my nervousness about the lack of clothes vanished.. people started reminding me that London is this fab fashion place. URGH. now, i have to look fashionable! HAHA. Im so done for. LOL.

Well, yesterday, my fmaily celebrated my youngest brother's birthday in advanve soce i would be missing it. HE had a barney cake. And i was looong! And i dont like cream cake and all, but this cake was pretty good!

Well, the festivities wasnt all that smooth-sailing. Mum got a little pissed but that mine and dad's fault i guess. I didnt eat much but i enjoyed spending time with my aunties! =D I looove them. Many relatives gave me money and well wishes, wishing me a safe trip there. And it made me feel so scared of flying off. I dont want this is to be last time i see all my loved ones! =( Things happen, i know. Thats why i have to keep God with me at all times, during my journey and if He has greater plans for me, then, i will accept it.

Well, im going to London to learn, so i hope it will be a learning experience both in literature form and culturally.

Well, i feel like starbucks, i shall get a frappucino later. =D

Goodbye world. I'll be back in 17th. I'll miss blogging and Singapore.

Thank you to DadMa,for the time and money spent on this trip. I love my family, and i will miss everyone, and the noise, and the bickers, and the mocking. I will miss you guys so much more than you know. I hope God brings me back to you safely.

To Mun Ling, no last goodbyes, but thats okay. Better off that way maybe? I love you babe. dont miss me too much! HAH. Have fun at tuition!

Tomy aunts, you guys are sooo much fun to talk to. So friendly and nice. Thank you for making me feel so warm and giving me sooo much support.

To all my other relatives, thank you for the well-wishes, the money, the support. Thank you for coming yesterday.

I hope to see all of you again. Take care while im gone. <3

SICK!

2007-12-01T05:53:00.000-08:00

Literally.

I cannot believe im sick again! Ive been sick on and off this past month and its really making me miserable! =( i hate being sick cos my nose jsut kills me. Im kinda thinking like whats been making me sick and i think i know! Lack of vegetables! Its been lacking in my diet, seriously!

OH GOSHHHH. I better get well soon! Ive been sneezing a lot. And my dad said my nose is like Rudolph's. ERRRR... NOT GOOD! Ive jsut had one "proper" meal today. Instant noodles, tom Yam! OH GOSHHHH. Not healthy at all! =( My dad jsut called and scolded me for not taking my meds. Understandable since my trip is just 3 ~~freaking~~ days away and i cant afford to fall sick especially in the chilly winter! Wish me well, friends!

Well, lets change the subject. Today was the start of MTV's Top 100 songs of the year. And if im not mistaken, they stopped at #80 today. It was nice to see all the songs, but no rocks songs as of yet except maybe Everything we had by The Academy Is... Love that song!

Did i mention, im going to miss the Liverpool VS Manchester United match, which is on the 16th of Dec and i come home on the 17th! AHHHHHHHHHHH. Seriously! FREAKING OUT. Thats like match of the season, people. Maybe they have cable on Brunei Airlines. OMGOSHHHHH. Who am i kidding? =(

Well, you know me, Liverpool. I would never miss a match purposely right! Im still your 12th for that night. I will be cheering with my heart and soul on the airplane. And you shall win the game.

DONT LET MAN U BE THE ONE TO TAKE YOU OFF YOUR WINNING STREAK. YOU ARE THE RED TIDE. THEY ARE THE RED WEENIES. SO CRUSH THEM.

And anyway, i disagree to Ronaldo being Wolrd player of the year. He jsut won the EPL. KAKA won the UEFA CHAMPIONS LEAGUE. So duhhhhh, KAKA should win! And then comes Ronaldo and the Cute as pink Lionel Messi. Dont you just love that Argentinian! So great with his moves, swift, quick and talented. AHHHHH, you take my breathe away, Lionel Messi! but Torres takes my heart away, so youre still 2nd ( or third, now that ive thought twice). HEHEHEH.

AH! this is an idea, why dont i give a list of my fave footballers! HAHAHAHAHA. Im so excited! Check this footballers out people, especially with Euro Cup coming so soon! Hurrah!

1) Fernando Torres (LIVERPOOL/SPAIN)
ALWAYS AND FOREVER.

2) David Villa (VALENCIA/SPAIN)
Oh please transfer to Liverpool this January!

3) Lionel Messi (AC MILAN/ ARGENTINA)
thought of Anfield as the place to play?? We did beat you once, you know. Maybe thats too much to ask for! HEH.

4) KAKA ( AC MILAN/ BRAZIL)
LOVES GOD, FILIAL, WHAT ELSE?? RIGHT, MASSIVE TALENTS!

5) Steven Gerrard (LIVERPOOL/ENGLAND)
GOOOOO CAPTAIN!

6) Pepe Reina (LIVERPOOL/SPAIN)
CLEAN SHEETS ARE YOUR CALL!

7) Zinadine Zidane (RETIRED) (REAL MADRID/FRANCE)
GOLDEN BOOTS DEFINATELY FOR YOU! WORKING WITH THE UN TO FIGHT POVERTY, HOW KIND!

8) David Beckham (LA GALAXY/ENGLAND)
HEY, NOONE CAN BEND IT LIKE YOU!

9) Inzaghi (AC MILAN/i have no idea!)
THE MAN I LOVE TO HATE. PLEASE DONT SCORE AGAINST US AGAIN.

10)Da Silva (VALENCIA/SPAIN)
OHHHH... YOUR RESENBORG/SCHALKE MISSES.

As you can see, im biased towards Liverpool and Spain. HAHAH. Too bad now aint it? OKAY. I have a lot of respect for AC Milan players too as they gave Liverpool a great challenge during last year's UCL Finals, which we sadly lost, but do not forget, ISTANBUL night, people. NEVER FORGET THAT NIGHT. for that game is worth a place in soccer history. =D I love Liverpool, what can i say? Well, there are probably other great players, but the players ive choosen have that appeal factor too. Most are fathers already *ahem*. HEY, i like fatherly figures!

LOL.

Okay guys, enough blogging. the Hills are waiting for me! SEE YOU!

Sleep deprived

2007-11-30T07:29:00.000-08:00

helloh.

Whats up Whats up!!

Today was a very tiring day. but satisfying, nonetheless.

It started with a 6.45am wake up call for trainng at 8am. I practically had to drag myself uot of bed. And "lucky" me, it was soccer night the night before so i still hadnt clocked my 8 hours of sleep per day. so i was really dead beat.

The weather was chilly with the wind and thankfully my dad sent me to school so it svaed me 45cents and time. I was among the two (beisdes Ayuni) to come early. everyone else came afters. What a pity, only 6 people came and coach wasnt present too.

Well, training atrted with 5 rounds aorund the track! And im proud to say ive not lost my ability to run too much. is till managed to clock 14 mins which is not bad i guess. Then we had the stations, which was a killer. At the end of it, my legs were a little bit jittery and i was hevaing a little.

then, Mis Lin came by and we started our drills in the Futsal. And ended off with a match. ayuni scarppedmy thumb's skin during the match, but thats okay! No pain No gain! =D I thught, ive improved quite a bit so, im quite satisfied with my form.

Howveer, i am still intimidated about challenges so i still have yet to build up my confidence.

Well, i'll be misisng out on the testi match this tues, which is a relieve cos well, im ot a big fan of matches as seen in the above paragraphs. And also the 10 Dec training. Sad, cos Coach should be back by then as thats after the Floorball tournament isnt it?

Well, after i got home, mum, dad, Qim, sis and I went to sheng shiong to get groceries and then it was off to cwp, in search of my waterproof shoes. they are so pretty i dont even want them to touch water. I really hope i dont spoil them even before school starts! =X they are nikes, iw nated Adidas, but the adidas shoes all had holes in them =( but nvm, lets just try nike for a year okay! HAHA.

Im all packed up... YEY. Tho i have a feeling, i wont be able to bring home enough souvenirs. =( I really wanna bring home LOTS AND LOTS of souvenirs. Well, my mum gave me 250pounds. Im happy cos shes spent a lot on my trip alr and im VERY thankfulShe got mad about the shoes actually but it was only because i took a loooonnnngggg time to decide what i wanted.

Well, thank you mum for making the effort to make my trip wonderful. I appreciate it. I will do my best to get you something nice and the family too! =D

Well, the night ended with me watching the repeat of newcastle VS Liverpool match. not bad not bad. we did went on this match even tho Torres missed like 74920289848940 number of shots. sadly!

Well, im o worn, i wanna turn in soon. Fahmie sent me this website to join this game. Omgoshhh... so adictive. I wanted them RUBIESSSS! =X hahah.

goodnight world.

Wasted time

2007-11-29T00:25:00.000-08:00

hey people.

hmmm... im getting butterflies.
Yesterday, i tried to sleep before the LFC UCL match, and i couldnt quite sleep. i was tossing and turning for at least 45 mins! And i never have that problem. I usually get knocked out within 20 mins. hmmm... i guess i just had a lot of things on my mind!

Mostly, the UK trip! =( I keep thinking about WHAT IFS! How dumb is that? Like, What if i forgot to bring my passport. What if i freeze my butt off there? What if ive not enough clothes! What if i dont get to buy enough souvenirs! what it i dont have fun! WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF!!!!

=(

As you can see, im really nervous about the trip. Ive packed my stuff. Not everything! but, 3/4 of the stuff. And being the paranoid person that i am, my luggage is FULL. Thankfully theres still have space to breathe so hopefully, i can fit lots of small cute merchandise in there. =D

I wanted to bring 2 scarves, then i thought, i dont think thats necessary since im wearing tudong too. Then they wrote in the things-to-bring list that we should bring 8 tops. Are they CRAZY??? How the heck do you fit that in tgt with your thermals and sleeping clothes? I brought 4. And one thick woolen one to just wear over anything if it gets too cold.

I have no idea WHYYYY im telling you all this here. Im jsut nervous. OMGOSSSHHHH. =(

Well, anyway, lets just change the subject.

Went to the zoological garden yesterday with Family! Okay, yest was like Wreck Day. Cos everything was jsut not going right. It was like one thing after next kept popping up to make family time so unbearable. I was sulking all the way through my youngest bro's check up at KK. Then, mum was in a foul mood, then when we reached the zoo, syrup spilled and we had this trail of rose syrup following our footstep. SHEEEESSSHHHHKEBABBBBSSSS~

But after that, things started falling into place, and we slowly enjoyed ourselves. watching all the animals and all. im seventeen (going on 18) but i have to admit, the Zoo brings back good memories of primary school days when Zoo trips were always part of post-exams activities. And then, we enjoyed it cos we were with our frinds with our little backpacks with sandwiches our mums made, and keropok! HAHA. now, we learn to appreciate the zoo better when we visit it. Like, the animals itself. And you are also amazed at the majesty of some animals. All the signboards with the history of the animals, interest you and you also have more empathy.

Well, it was a fun trip as you can see. and i would like to reiterate. If i could zoo animals in my house, i would keep the elephant, the giraffe AND the panda. Recently, i fell in love with the sloth. AWWWWWWWWW. SLOTHS RULE! =D i should make it my life goal, "to hug a sloth and walk at least 10m with it around me" HAHAHAHA. Now, that would be sight!

Anyway, today, went out with mum to get all the other stuff for my trip like panadol. Im still afraid of freezing my butt there! =(( I hope it snows tho. Ive been watching the weather report in News 5 tonight recently, and yesterday, it the lowest temp in london was 4 DC. But worse still, it was raining! So, i hope to get good shoes this weekend.

it 4.44pm. HAHAHA. how cool. i intend to do math today! =D *whispers - FREAK*

Well, friday, saturday, sunday, monday and im off to London.

Im excited. Im excited. Im excited. HAHAHA. PB's my roomie! YEY!

Hmm.. oh yeah. how can i forget. Liverpool have lit their path to the UCL! YEYYYYYY. Okay, last night game was not really convincing, but i think we did really well, despite all the pressure. Torres ( = lovee) scored twice, one a wonderful header that started the game and another to break the deadlock. Wonderful! So, at half time, i was really upset that Pool gave away a win in the last few minuted of the 1st half. Never do that! so it was 1-1. I hate Lopez. No offence, dude. But, not to fear, torres to the rescue! and it was 2-1. then a penalty, 3-1 and to cap the night off wonderfully, Crouch made it 4-1. Wonderful.

HAHAHAHA. BOO-YEAH! NEH-NEH-NEH-POO-POO!

Looks like it wasnt your night to qualify, Porto! And Marseille you little devil! for making us lose on home ground, you will get it from us at your home ground. We will chop suey you! KARATE CHOP! Okay, im sorry. Im jsut getting very excited for the next matchday of UCL. Cos if we win, which we will, we will qualify! Lets hope Basiktas can hold Porto to a draw at least, that way, Pool will top the GROUP. hurrah! Okay, i really hope Pool dont waste this opportunity. Die, Die must qualify. Or else, Benitez's head will be threatened with the chopper.

However, in my opnion, Benitez should not be changed. It doesnt mean, a change in coach will in turn lead to a change in results. Plus, our results in the domestic league isnt too bad either! We are scoring beyond the 1-0 margin. So, keep Benitez, as much as i dont quite fancy the rotation policy, maybe, he can prove us wrong here. Whatever it is, Benitez, dont be England's coach! =X

And Jose Murinho as England coach is also a bad idea. I dont knwo why exactly, but its jsut an instinct. ERRRR... sorry if that doesnt make sense!

OOOPPPSSS. its 5pm gotta start on my work!

CIOWZED! Love you. And ML, im missing you! "Are you back yet?"

simple plan in Spore

2007-11-27T03:39:00.000-08:00

i missed the webchat on mtvasia.

i deserve to be smacked on the head.

dont yu know the difference between 7 and 9, syuhrah

now you cant see them hot guys "live".

You deserve a smack.

Indeed i do.

PLS PLS PLS quickly upload the webcast!!!!! =(

Im a desperate woman here!

South Africa and its own Beauty

2007-11-25T19:20:00.000-08:00

The holidays have changed my perspecives of a new week.

during school terms, i always looked at sundays as the 1st signs of dreading the oncoming week. Its like "WHATTTT??? another week of school??!! *$*#($*^(%)#*@#*" there goes the swearing. HAHA.

but now thats its the holidays, i love it Mondays, cos it means its the beginning of great(!) shows from 8 onwards. SIGHHHH. How i will miss this excitement come January. =X thou Shall not Speak of it.

HAHA.

Well, ive yet to read duchess of Malfi. HURRRR. And ive yet to do othe rmath revision. Seriosly people.

Well, looks like im not going out after all since ML sounds busy. i was looking forward to lunch, but nvm. Shes off to Bintan tmr. Who is going to motivate me to study now??? Im soooo doomedddd. =P I will miss you babe. I definately will. but have a blast okay. It will be long before you have a good holiday again. So dont be afraid to HAVE FUNNNN!

Well, yesterday, they did the draw for the FIFA world cup qualifiers. How exciting. Ermmm... Singpore is in in the same group as Lebanon and 2 other teams, but i didnt watch it for long, cos draws take forever. =/

Well, 2010 World cup is going to be held in South Africa. And of course, South Africa has been under some amount of scrutiny because of all the problems it is facing as a developing country but isnt that what the World Cup is for? to bring people together for a common cause?

Soccer is the common cause. And this is the platform that can help bring attention to the cause of the Africans. So instead of saying all the problems they have, see it as a challenge, and combat it, as people of the world, we are responsible for the circumstances others go through too. Open your eyes, South Africa is a wonderful place. I say, Give them a chance to take centrestage this time for good. Let them be proud for this is the sport that they helped spread to the world. The talents are from there, so why should we not celebrate that?

Of course, jsut like any cynic, i wasnt too pleased with the decision when they said 2010 World Cup is going to be held in S.Africa. I tot (no offence) disease stricken, widespread poverty etctec. But then yesterday, i thought again, isnt the World Cup about opportunities? thats why they have it in different continents for every tournament. Thats the beauty of it all, OPPORTUNITIES.

I love FIFA president's speech. I thought it was honest, and it hit the nail. It drove home the message behind S.Africa being host to 32 nations.

How i shall enjoy watching World CUp 2010. i can only imagine my life then.It all seems so surreal. in 3 years time, where would i be? Well, lets not get off topic here, S.Africa will do a great job as the host. They have my support.

Besides, this could what the Africans needs. A break to show themselves through what they do best and not thorugh all the negatives they are faced with everyday.

May 2010 World cup be the platform in which the people of the world, will unite without barriers jsut as it has been for all other World Cups.

REJOICE, for S.Africa!

Overdued PICCCCXXXXX

2007-11-24T20:14:00.002-08:00

helloh! So, i finaly got batt for my camera. TADDAAAAA. more pics from bbq! Decipher for yourself and have fun!

Class Gathering '07~

As i put together all this pictures, im overwhelmed with emotions. Happy ones, all the jokes and fun we had that day. It seems so long ago, but i can remember the details of that day vividly. Who knew i would have such fun, loving friends in a year. Who knew i'd be someone outspoken. I learnt to laugh at myself, be myself. that i dont need to look glamourous or perfect (not that i look anywhere near that!) to be accepted.

Many take years to realise this. And they go searchinto deep into corners of the world to find the love i have here. i love everything about 07. And sure, there will be times i wished i could take back, but thats the wonderful thing about LIFE isnt it? You take what you get and you have to make the best out of it.

And 2008 will be another year of surprises. And i will embrace the bittersweet of 08. I know its going to be a challenging year, but thats life right? I will go thorugh one year of hell, and finally, thats the end of my strict study curriculum. Hoepfully after that, i'll be headed into NUS or NTU, and begin another chapter of my life there.

but lets take it a step at a time, get through Block tests in march and strat getting my C and D's, then work my way up to A's.

It all seems so figured out, when it is all FARRRRRR from being figured out.

time to burn

2007-11-23T19:27:00.000-08:00

Im goign out with ML later, meeting at 2pm. I hope things work out cos i wanna spend time with her beofre she heads to Bintan, then i head to London.

We're going Borders, lets see what we can get there. SHEEESSSSHHHH. i have no money thanks to all the people borrowing money from me. i hope my mum gives me money.

Anyway, jsut to continue where i left off yesterday, went shopping with family for nice warm clothes, then, we went to eat at Delifrance for dinner. WEEEEEEEE. Lovely y'all! Something fancy for a change.

Well, my 2 brothers has lasagne, while i had spaghetti prawn. Nice, but i think more gravy would be better. and i also had hot chocolate! YEY!

Then, i shared with my dad a nice mango pudding and tried my mum's chocolate pudding. Delfrance was truly a worthy experience cos i was soooo full once i got out. My mum got some nice cookies home, and then, it was back home to study.

And i did a part of Lecture 7. like 1/3 of lect 7 before heading to MSN. HAHAHAH. im so bad with time management!

Well, i jsut relaised yesterday, that i got Mel's birthday worng! i tot it was 23rd when it was 21st! AHHHHHHHH! im so bad with birthdays its embarassing! Who gets birthdays mixed up? SHESSSSHHHH. Sorry, mel. =(

Well, ive time to burn. Im looking at blogskins now. AHHHHH. Maybe its time to change right? HAHA.

I hate short paragraphs but i cant help it this time.

Well, i better ciowzed.

OHHHH. my mum is going for this Barney thing with my little brother. HAHAH. at Suntec convention. LOL. That will be fun! =P

Love youuuuuuu.

10 more days to LONDON

2007-11-23T07:09:00.000-08:00

have i explained my qualms vis-a-vis going to London?
In fact sometimes, i kinda freak out with the unpredictability of it all.
Im afraid i'll freze my butt off.
im afraid of being homesick.
im afraid that i wont have as much fun cos ML (BABE!) is not there and im afraid i cant fit in or something.
Im worried i cant buy enough stuff for my mum.
Im worried vegetarian food will be horried

=(

But then, im still looking forward to it. I mean, its an experience right? i wont knwo if i dont keep my mind open.

Talking to ahmad. He says JAMIE KNWOS MY NAME. thats fairly embarassing.

Ermm.. Simple plans coming to town. AHHHHHHHHH. i heart you, SP. I will definately check out your performance on 98.7 and your webcast on MTVASIA.

I WILL I WILL I WILL.

Today went out with Family. Mum was not on shift, and dad was sick so he got and MC. and we went to masjid An-nur first then went CWP to get my turtlenecks. i didnt really get turtlenecks but somthg like that will do larh since i have scarves.

Im tlaking to ahmad about Europe. this guy never fails to entertain me. =)

Well, my mind is kinda cluttered. Ive not been able to write what i intended due to all the chatting happening.

NEXT TIME THEN...

Ciowzed!

Answer me McLaren

2007-11-21T19:31:00.000-08:00

Why did inexperienced Carson start?
Why did you play Bridge in leftback?
Why was defenders assuming offside?

WHY DID YOU START WITH 4-5-1?

WHY OH WHY OH WHY, MCLAREN?????

Of course any England fan and I cant solely place the failure of a Euro Final position on McLaren. there were of course many other factors, undeniably like how we had many injured players, including Terry and Ferdinand was suspended.

Again,

WHY OH WHY, MCLAREN???

I had barely 4 hours of sleep to watch a match that crushed England's hopes of qualifying. My dear, as if, Israel's gift to us was not precious enough for you. It was a lifeline that you did not appreciate enough to get out at Wembley with a fighting spirit. Instead Croatia had their hands to our necks by the 14th minute leading by 2 goals already.

They played football. Engalnd just gave longballs. It was only after second half that you revived, with the addition of Beckham and Defoe. You didnt learn your lesson. Beckham is essential in an England side which is out to win. Our free kicks and corners, taken by Barry were not even half the quality of Beckham's. It was Beckham who gave a lovelylovely pass to Crouch who scored the equaliser. I could watch that smooth movement over&over again.

But, the defence had to go down again and Croatia scored to win the definitive match 2-3.

England lost at home. This has never happened in history. England has never lost away (2-0) and at home to the same competitors.

I would like to applause Croatia for playing beautifully. For playing Football. Joga Bonito. Everytime, croatia were at England's territory, i secretly hoped for them to score cos i wanted to see a quality shot. I wanted to see nice passing, flow and a swift goal. Something i barely got out of england's playing.

So congratulations Croatia. You were the deserving team of tonight's match, topping the group.

And to Russia who needed to beat andorra at home which they did 1-0.

Which leaves England 3rd in the table one point away from Russia thus failing to secure a position in the final 16 of the Euro Finals.

Well, frankly, even if england did make it miraculously, they wouldnt have deserved the place. They wouldnt have lasted the competition, so you know what, its good for the fans to feel the pain now then to be whacked, much to our embarassment, during the finals. Also why should a side with no quality be in the Finals? After all, Euro finals is prestigious and only some have the quality deserving of a position.

In addition, next year is A-levels so, that leaves me with one less distraction.

Thank you, McLaren for making it easier for me to not watch soccer.
Now its time for you to give your resignation or i really hope FA will remove you. Please do. Im sorry, but your time as a manager, was long overdued.

Spain made it, and Czech Rep so im looking forward to seeing this quality sides play.

Maybe, Croatia will surprise us all, by going far. They have the quality players so why not?

GO CROATIA.

and England, its time for you to reflect. For your 12th man is deeply disappointed in you. We had the very same dream as you but you failed to deliver.

WHY OH WHY OH WHY, ENGLAND???

Backbreaking

2007-11-20T02:46:00.000-08:00

Listening to Jonas Brothers: SOS

Did i mention, one of the jonas Brothers tripped right before he began his performance during the AMAs. isnt that soooo funny? Okay, im not trying to be evil here, but even i would laugh at myself if i tripped in front of a whole load of people! HAHA.

Anyway, the vid for that song is alright.

Ive studied quite a bit today actually. =) And my back hurts quite a lot. Well, im jsut going to study a bit more after i eat dinner which is after this.

Then from ten onwards till 12++ its teevee time on Channel 5.

SAY GREY'S ANATOMY!!!!!!!!

=D

i deserve it you know. HAHA.

Maybe, thats what i'll miss the most once school starts. All the good shows on Channel 5. All the late nights jsut watching teevee and and crying for some crazy reason.

I watched Brothers&Sisters yesterday. WOW. I loove the show, man. I always tot it was boring until i missed Desperate Housewives yesterday and tot i'd give B&S a try.... I LOVE IT. it made me cry.

The shows is good cos its about family. And being a family oriented person, i can really feel for the mum. When her daughter said "then, stop punishing me." i was like "WAAAAAHHHHHH.....". Well, the mum lost her husband, and in this episode, realised he had a daughter she never met. And she always made her oldest daughter her punching bag when she got mad and thats why her daughter said "then, stop punishing me.". Isnt that true? You always make someone else your Punching bag.

For me, its My dad. When i get mad at my mum, i'll be rude to my dad. then i'll cry later cos i feel so wrong. He doesnt deserve it. Especially when he tries to warm my heart by saying "Are you mad at me?" All i want to do, is cry. cos i love him so much and he doesnt deserve this treatment. He doesnt deserve to be my punching bag. but, what can i say, daddy's girl right?

I love you, dad.

Well, on a happier note (for my parents anyway), they are out catching Beowulf w/o us pests... HAHA. I was like "Get me a souvenir" and he was like "You think we going to the museum huh?" LOL. Then my mum was like "We'll be seeing the movie for you" before she left the house. thanks, ma. =)

Well, its 7.10pm now.

Listening to The All-American Rejects: Dance inside.

I wanna do something other then math, man. I wanna do Econs, bnt i have no idea WHERE TO START. LIKE WHEREEEEE??????

LOL.

Oh, i watched Oprah today. the one at 9am and 1pm. Oprah is amazing i tell you. Shes so funny yet educational. I watched the health quiz with Dr Oz today, its super good please. all the health advice about your diet and how much to eat and all the interesting stuff he brings on set. You better read about Omentum. Its really amazing.

Oh, and you can check if youve the right waist line. Take your height, convert it to inches. divide it by 2. then use the measuring tape, take the measurement from your belly to around your body. thats your waistline. I think if im not mistaken the best waistline is 32. Ive not measured mine. Oh, i forgot, you have to breathe in. Cos your omentum cant be hidden then, and that your true measurement.

And clear pee is a good sign. =D

and the fat at the belly is the most dangerous. the ones in the thigh, buttocks are okay.

And make sure you check your blood pressure. It could help slow down your ageing process.

And Alzheimer... i know what it is now.

Im so the dietician. Ive been cutting down my carbo, since i wanna drop to my 43 again. Im at 45 now. Errrr... long way to go, thats right.

Why cant studying be as fun as watching Oprah? They should make like "Oprah periods" in schools.

Well, im done here.

Listening to Boys like Girls: The Great Escape. I likeeeeee.... Martin. SIGHHHH. Lucky girl in the Hero/Heroine V2 video. HURH.

Music And Lyricssss

2007-11-18T20:41:00.000-08:00

Helloh.

I feel like my blog is dying due to the lack of updates but nothings going on. Thanks to the introvert me who doesnt fancy going out, im stuck watching teevee and my daily dose of music.

So today, i watched American Music Awards (AMA). I've always thought that the AMas were among the most boring music shows ever due to the lack of fanciness and well, rock music. But this year, was different and its much better that i expected.

Jimmy Kemmel was the host, he wasnt very funny as he was in the beginning with his soulja boy dance, but... he has done this 4 times so... PROPS.

i dont know if i missed any performance, but i saw Fergie's performance of Big Girls Dont Cry and i was impressed altho she wasnt spot on with her vocals, she wasnt too bad. But i have to say, Will.i.am's next single is going to be goooood. im not sure of the title though then came babylove by Nicole Shcerzinger but i didnt think it was not too impressive.

So Daughtry picked up 3 awrads, beating the likes of Linkin park (surprising) but nevertheless deserving cos i have to say, their album is good. =)

But, i think my favourite performance will ahve to be Chris Brown's f/ T-pain performance with Kiss Kiss. Dont you love the song? HAHA. I love it, and i love Chris Brown. One of my favourite hip hop/rnb artiste for sure. I thought that Rihanna f/ Ne-yo performance of Hate that i Love you was good. Rihanna was damn flirtatious but it made the song real so that was good stage presence. Alicia Keys did great too, she did a medley of Noone and her next single i think. Many in the crowd were up on their feet dancing to her performance. And she had some movesss too! IMPRESSIVE. HAHA.

Oh, Carrie Underwood's dress wasnt nice. =( it looked weird... but Kelly Pickler's black number was nice though maybe common in other award shows.

Well, you should check the AMAs out im sure there will be repeats so catch it, i think you'll have a good time.

Recently, i managed to catch the Europe Music Awards (EMAs) too!

EMAs are always fun compared to AMAs as Serj Tankian From System of a Down correctly pointed out. =D

Dave Grohl had his very own VIP corner with Taylor. And omgoshhh, he was like LOOSE, man. But he was very funny cos he got to talk to Nicole shcerzinger, Lewis Hamilton, will.i.am, MCR etc!! SO MUCH FUN.

did i mention Snoop Dogg hosted?!?!?! HAHA. That surely spells FUNNNNN.

Im biased so i hae to say MCR's performance of Teenager just blew me away and the best performance! HAHA. WHATTTTT....

Gerard Way had a new haircut and so does Mikey. And they were really spot on with the vocals. The cheerleaders with the gas masks were creative too plus the cofetti effect at the end, GREAT. lol.

Hmm... what other performances were there?

Oh, Avril's HOT. I thought it was okay. i dont like the song though. But, nvm. Im not an avril fan so yeah.

Listening to Colbie Caillat - Bubbly

Well, EMAs were great fun tho i dont think i saw the whole think cos i was busy laughing at the Office. I loveeee that stupid show.

Im seeing ML later at 2++pm. Shes studying now while im blogging. How wise, syuhrah.

I've been awake for a while now
You got me feeling like a child now
'Cause every time I see your bubbly face
I get the tinglies in a silly place

Before i die

2007-11-17T02:32:00.000-08:00

Okay... im bored. Ive visitedd blogs, mtvoverdrive, played isketch, done some math maclaurins questions, tried 5 to be exact and done with looking through all the places im visiting in london (i think) so... IM BORED. LOL. Thus, i shall...

Do my list of what i want to do before i die or well, life's goals.

PLEASE DONT LAUGH. HAHA.

1) finish reading the holy book.
2) go to NUS. I love history, english and the mass media. So, i'll be venturing into either one. then, we'll seen for further studies. =P
3) Have a family by ermmm.. 30? but preferably 27.
4) Go for a concert/drama/musical. Ive been to see oliver twist but thats all! i want to go for a band concert. DEFINATELY.
5) Go to ANFIELD or STANLEY PARK, LIVERPOOL. Visit the stadium and watch a match LIVE. I wnat to do this with my dad especially. Cos he made me RED =)
5)Go watch Oprah in chicago.
6) Go back-trekking
7) Join amazing race. I know this is cheesy but seriously! HAHA.
8) Be financially stable that i can support my youngest sib for school and his dreams. I intend to get him a guitar when he grows older.
9) get my parents on a holiday, jsut the 2 of them.
10) visit Madam Tussauds' Wax museum. pardon, my spelling. if i cant meet ALL the celebrities, this is as real as it gets.
11) go to SPAIN with Munling
12) Have a lifelong friendship with Munling. remember our babysitting promise babe!
13) Go to Mecca. I believe, that if i fulfill this, than all the other goals, do not matter. this is most important.

Is that enough? HAHA. this has helped me keep focus. of course this is in the long run and if i screw up next year, i can wave goodbye to all these goals... but, i wont screw up next year. I want to achieve all of this.

To build me up then tear me down

2007-11-14T22:57:00.000-08:00

you always ruin everything.
the simplest days
the nicest words

i dont even know why i was so sorry yesterday.
Just when i thought you appreciated me.

whatever, ma.

im so sick of being disappointed by your actions.
Ive been fighting this battle since i was 10.

i hate you for making me smile then tearing me down.

next time, do me a favour, Dont bother.

BBQ FUNNNNN...

2007-11-12T06:11:00.000-08:00

Helloh.

Cherrioooossss people. Had a good day? I had a GREAT day. I spent it with friends, frineds, friends! YEY! Anyway...

The day started off with Floorball training supposedly to start at 8.40pm. BUT, thanks to our school gate that locks automatically at 8.00 or 8.30 we had to walk the LOOOONNNNNNGGGGGG way, all the way to the entrance. PHEW-yoooo! HAH, so me and shahirah, lela ayuni and later joined by nadiah, we trudging near the muddy fields, so near yet so far from school! =(

We saw Jamie, from outside. LOL. so we knew, we were a little late. Reached the grandstand by 9 and started doing dribbles and hits. And then, Jamie guided me on how to hit the ball. After joining FB for like 7 months or less, i still cant hit the ball. ahamd would be laughing till he tears, i tell you. Anyway, Jamie was really nice about it and just helped me with it. He even encouraged me. WOOOOOWWWW. HAHA. Oh yeah, he asked for my name. For those ou know the story, you'll know why its soooo embarassing.

But he pronounced it wrongly at first, it was like 3 syllabus. Syu-ri-ah. ERRRR... i didnt even bother to correct him cos i thought it was too rude. But, haha, my FB girls corrected him. LOL. Im so stoked he knows my name! =D

Then we did some fitness, PT style. but, i tot that it was rather fun! =) i enjoyed myself although, my heart was beating so fast, i was a little worried. LOL. but i ddi pretty well, except the part where you have to have good coordination, i always miss the last stick. URGHH. =P

Training ended, tho i tot that time went especially slow today.

Then, sat ard with FB-ers and reached home at 12.30am. Quickly called Safa to postpone our meeting. HAHAH. Typical teenagers.

Got ready, met Safa at 1.20 in the last cabin and met the girls at the MRT station. Went to Lot 1 to EAT.. and at first, we all wanted to get something light, but thank god, for Safa's idea to eat at Pizza Hut. He had 2 regular pizza Hawaiian and seafood and drumlets. =D Yumm-ilicious! HAHA. So we each had 2 slices of pizza and a drink of coke. which amounted to $55.45.

Unprepared shot... ERR... the timer, went off fatser than expected... as can be seen from my surprised face.

All ready to EATTT... WHERES THE FOOOOD?? =D

Then we were off to Ten mile Mall.

Me not listening to Mel's lecture on what we were going to get in sheng shiong =X Lydia was like, pic here pic there!

I didnt take any pics in SS cos we were all busy calculating ensuring that we didnt spend more than our budget. It was fun tho, iw as grouped up with Lydia and Nicole Tan. HAHAH. it was nice cos we like trying to pick the correct fishes, prawns and all. =D I looooveeee you girlsss!

So while the rest took Taxi back, me and nictan took LRT.

Me and NicTan rushing to get to her place to prepare the BBQ! Palms Garden.

Theres something wrong with my camera suddenly. SERIOUSLY. HURH. next time then.

Ciowzed!

to blog or not to blog

2007-11-11T02:00:00.000-08:00

im rrrreeeeeeeaaaaalllllllyyyyyyy boredddd.

So im trying to blog.

I think ive watched season 3 of Laguna beach, but then, im wacthing it AGAIN.

Im only looking forward to the BBQ tmr with the girls. Cos all the ~~jerks~~ guys are not coming! HAHAH. okay, all the guys but you get what im trying to say. So i hope i have fun tmr. And pictures.. i hope they keep rolling in. HAHAH.

Well, liverpool won again. thanks to Fernando Torres, i got 3 points and am griving up the prempredictor table. jsut 9 points from PalvinSingh. HAHAHA. Watch your back dude.

I think that is all. I cant wait for tmr. Oh, did i mention, i agreed to go for Floorball tmr. =X i have no idea what im thinking but, yeah.

Ciowzed

Apologize

2007-11-09T07:39:00.000-08:00

Listening to Apologize makes me sad suddenly.

Reminds me of Grey's anaotomy episodes
And dear me, i missed Survivor China tonight! SHEESHHH.

anyway, im really into Grey's anatomy now. Im still trying to get the episode between Izzy's engagement, and her fiance's death. i know ive watched till the part she tried to save him by doing some illegitimised operation, then thanks to exams, i got cut short and the next time iw atched it, her fiance was dead. I didnt manage to see the most beautiful part in which she cried in her wonderful dress.

OhMyohMy.

I love Grey's anatomy. I like the ending where Meredith narrates some the whole episode, where she talks abiut the moral or the meaning behind this episode. the mistakes and talks of the fear of the future. ANd her voice jsut grips you, catches your attention.

ahmad gave me a link but for some reason it cant work.

URGHHHHH.

somebody help me before i suffer painfully. LOL

Im getting tired. its 11.45pm.

I hope my head doesnt throb tmr. =/

Goodnight world.

Grey's Anatomy ETC ETC

2007-11-08T23:25:00.001-08:00

All ive been doing for the past few days is watch teevee. play SIMS and go to internet to blog or watch vids.

I must be freaking out of my mind.

OHMYGOSHHHH.

I should get started soon right? but im in this totaly holiday mood and this sucks. They say that once you get started you'll be motivated to continue, so maybe i should get strated.

BREATHER.

I will. SOON.

Guess what im doing now?

Im looking at websites of places i'll be visiting in London. Everythings pretty much expensive but im thinking of souvenirs for my parents and all. I went to the Jane Austen Museum Gift Shop and they hae nice notebooks and such... i though of getting myself a 2008 diary but i bet innova will be goving us one so i might as well, not waste money on a planner.

but i did see some interesting stuff.

Ohwells, im checking our Shakespeare birthplace now.

I found out Sandrans not going to London with us. Thats so saddd! =( Im gonna miss his funny theatrics. I was k=lloking forward to jsut having him around to be all fun with. LOL.

Ive decided to bring the Guide and some of my history lecture notes for reading on the coach rides. That way, i can read and not fall asleep thus i can look outside and view the surroundings. Neat eh?

Im looking forward to the trip but im pretty worried too. Im very sure i'll be homesick by the 5th day. Ive never been away for soooo long with out my parents. AAAHHHHH. Im sure it'll be really nice to get back to Sinagpore aftter 11 days in London. Im worried baout being homesick, so hopefully the people there will be able to cheer me up and keep it fun so i wont think of home so much.

Will there be Wi-Fi there? I hope so. Im still thining if i shoudl bring my lappie. Cos, i wanna keep pics and email them to family. And even ML if shes cool with it. Im so afraid being the klutz that i am that i will "forget" it. LOL.

Well, im excited for it. SERIOSULY.
Cant wait to drop by MLs to get all the winter stuff.

Meanwhile, lemme read all these websites okay!

Ciowz-edD. Love you!

All hail the REDS!

2007-11-07T23:09:00.001-08:00

Thats the way to do it, REDS!
And i dont mean, the demolition.
i mean, the fire when you play. Keeping the tempo up and keeping the possession, taking your chances, smiling while you play. Thats the a winning team.
Thats the winning team's attitude, and REDS, you were the winning team on Wednesday morning.

HURRRRRRAAAAAHHHHHHHH for you!

I was a little sleepy towards the 2nd half but you totaly made watching the whole 2 hrs worth it. =D

So congrats and please keep it up agianst Fulham this weekend.

Your One Mistake

2007-11-06T02:27:00.000-08:00

Ever made a mistake you wished you could take back?
Ever thought you heard a voice calling you but shrug off and say, "nahh.. cant be."
Ever forget to do something, and accidentally kill?

I was discussing these with Safarina at the interchange on the way to school.
YOUR ONE MISTAKE.

I saw it on Oprah ermmm... last year? or was it a few minths ago? I miss Oprah. =/

*
*
*

Anyway, i woke up with a throbbing head, i hate my brother's bed. He really needs to get a new mattress!

Went to Mac at 9+ to meet the girls but apparently im not latest man. HAH. Bought food even though i had NO appetite cos i didnt want to starve in during history lect. Oh, we were talking about calories. Its most suitable to eat only 3000 calories right? Any food experts, please verify. Anyway, didnt finish my food =( and went off to school.

It was a very rainy day... so we took the bus 161 to school. and yes, we were late for history lect =P But guess what? History lect damn useless! cos its not about like, going through new notes or something, we recap-ed the lessons we had that year, and jsut went through from '08 stuff. But really. He was just saying about how our paper next year is most probably going to UNpredictable, thus, we are going to have a really horrible time doing the papers. And WHAT are our STRATEGIES for learning and revision. ERRRRR... seriously. SHEESH. Could have gone to have breakfast with ML and ahmad instead!

Silly Ahmad couldnt not decide where to eat thanks to his wisdom tooth and his healthy lifestyle. Hurrah for those of us who couldnt care less (we shall jsut pay our dues LATER =P)!

After that went CWP with Sher and Phil after forever of not talking to Phil. It felt really strange hanging out with him. Ermm... actually, we were so quiet. LOL. Like barely talked, but then, it got better. He wanted to see my mum who was coming down to buy toys for my baby bro.

So my mum came and guess who we met at CWP? Ridzuan my cousin. Its been like FOREVER since i last saw him. Im so glad hes okay. I mean, alhamdullilah, for god has taken care of him and his family. Hafizah is in the RI hostel. how great is that? I mean, we're not close, but after whats shes been thorugh, she deserves the best. after all, shes smart, she shouldnt let anything hinder her. I hope that things will work out soon for your family. Insyaallah.

Tomorrow is my bestfriend's birthday. Hairunnishah. I really hope i dont forget to wish her tonight! I always doooooo! *syuhrah gets boo-edd at!* LOL. Im really bad with birthdays.

but HEYHEYHEY!

Happy Birthday KHAIRUNNISHAH! LOVE YOU GIRL.

I refuse to use your make believe name, unlike those people ard you, i love you for you ant nothing superficial, will ever stand in between our frendship. I hope you have a blessed birthday for you deserve it, girl! LOVE YOU! =D

I ahve religious class tonight, im looking forward to it, jsut hope i can still read fluently. =) Peace, and serenity, thats what i need. OHHHHH, and i miss my chatterboxSibelOndek. HAHAH.

OH YEAHHHHHHH.
Did i mention? SIMS hanged on me like 3 times and all 3 times, i didnt save the update, so the next time i play i have to start from where i started... do you know how mad that made me? I was like rich! HURH. i hate SIMS.

Okay, What else? or BBQ plans. YEY. they are underway. But you wnat to know the bump in the plan, the boys arent even interested to come. SIGHHH. I dont care anymore larh. Not all the boys but jsut those common ones. HURH. Seriously. NVM, we'll have fun without them. NO FRET.

Alrightey people. LOVE YOU. CIOWZ-EDD.

RANDOMLY SPEAKING

2007-11-05T05:16:00.000-08:00

helloh

Im on MSN with AhmadAfzal right now. We were discussing about having breakfast tmr tgt with ML but ML has not replied me to give her confirmation. i think its cos shes studying.

~~I should be studying too.~~

SHHHHHHHUUUUUUUSSSSSSHHHHHHH.

HAHAH. i played Sims pets 2 on PS 2 for 3 hours today.
Im terrible.
I know.
Dont have to remind me.
Seriously, if this continues, im screwed.

I should be inspired by ML.

AHHHHHHHH.

Ahmad just told me that he asked about me to his national floorball friend who happens to be my coach. OMGGGGGGOSHHHHHH. So embarassing. WTHHH is this guy thinking ah. LOL. and stop with this face, ahmad! -.- Evil guy.

I better stop blogging. i should be playing sims at 10pm, but ive barely touched tutorial. =X greaaaatttt. Motivate me, people.

Love ya! CIOWZED.

My Old Friends

2007-11-03T20:26:00.000-07:00

Old as in not Literally okay!

I just visited nures' blog. and it remended me of how i never hang out with Amy and Nures anymore. Im such an introvert!

I feel bad that i keep saying i wanna meet up with them, but i never do. I would appreciate even a lunch with these girls. But november seems so occupied.

Ive got to prepare for my London trip.
Ive ot to study.
Ive still got school
Oh yeah, training. Shit, that reminds me, tmr ive got training for a match on the 8th. WTHHHH. Im so bad in floorball, even i dunno what to say about that!

Okay. what i know is, we are definately going out with ahmad soon. next week to be exact, hopefully. AHHHHHH... i cant wait, tho i feel like a lamp post between ML and ahmad, cos they are like eraser buddies, okay, only our little corner in 4e2 knows about it. LOL.

i have 0732A outing tentatively the week after this coming week.

and what about ML? we should like have breakfast with Ahmad on tuesday morn, then after that, we leave for our shopping experience or movie while ahmad goes to school! YEAHHHH. What about that?

I really want to hang out Nures and Amy suddenly. those pics make me miss them alotalot.

Im such a horrible friend. =( somebody, has got to take care of my schedule on my behalf. Maybe, all i need are freinds to hang out and my fever will GOOOOO AWAYYYY! HAHA.

It isnt that boring, is it?

2007-11-03T19:42:00.000-07:00

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS. it is. WTH is 0-0? Pool, WAKE UP LARH. WAKE UP. Let me be brutal here. Pool are not going to qualify for the Quarter finals of UEFA Champions League. Pool are gonna be soooooo lousy and BORING in their next 3 matches. thus, i am NOT going to watch the game against Basiktas this coming Tuesday. No way in hell, am i gonna wake up at 2++ till 5++ to watch a game that we are going to draw or worse, LOSE! WTHHHHHH?!?!?! @*%&@(%@^ Kuyt, you better do somthing about your composure in front of the goalpost, and Gerrard, you better have better communication with your players.

Torres, Xabi Alonso, Jamie Pennant I missssss youuuu. I miss having a great winger that can avoid losing the ball to defenders. I miss the great attacking midset of Xabi Alonso. and i miss torres' creativity of getting pass defenders, and taking his chances. Hell, take out hyypia, move riise to the centre, and put that guy whose name i cant remember right now. BUT NOT AURELIO pleasee! OHHHH, and freaking use Crouch can! WTHHHHH. suddenly i miss crouch too. Benitez is so evil to always sideline him.

After that disappointing draw at Ewood park, Blackburn, i shall not watch the Basiktas match. Why should i see it? HURH. Im so mad at Liverpool! but i still love them and support them, even tho i dont watch the match. =P

Anyway, did i mention that im sick? down with flu and fever. Should i still go swimming? im worried about my flu larh. LOL.

Catering duty was hell. but my mum gave me $20 buck for it, which i dont think is enough but money is money, right? im going get some from my Raya money and get that Charles&Keith sandals that i keep saying i want to buy but i never do. EHHHH, ML. buy with me?

Well, Im waiting for 1pm when i can eat my Meds again. I hate approaching the hour before i can take the Meds cos, my body goes into this crazy fit, where i think its cos the effectiveness of the Meds are diminishing.

DEar god, pleasepleaseplease make me better. Tmr theres school. =( ~~i hate math.~~ okayokay. i love math.... NOT.